Today's Funniest Tweets

Josh WolfordSocial Media

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Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Today, Twitter was buzzing about George Lucas altering Star Wars, T.I. being released from prison and the DOJ filing to block the AT&T T-Mobile Merger.

Plus we get a gem about Target and Conan O'Brien's musings about banana ratios. Enjoy!

I'd like to congratulate the DoJ on its recent acquisition of balls. 4 hours ago via UberSocial for BlackBerry · powered by @socialditto

I like my coffee to be like my secret eHarmony account's profile picture: black. 3 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

Listen Target, I always try products before I buy them and if that means dry humping the shit out of your body pillows in aisle 9, so be it. 4 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

T.I. is out of prison. He can go wherever he like. 2 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto

"Hey! I don't remember all those CGI space-dudes at the reception!"--George Lucas's wife re-watching their old wedding vids. 7 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

A bag of weed a day ... keeps the...something...I forget how it goes. What was I talking about? 6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Okay, AT&T: now you know how we feel when something doesn't go through. 5 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

My lifetime ratio of bananas purchased to bananas eaten is running about 5 to 1. 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

So, Dick Cheney has "heaped praise" on Tony Blair. Who's going to endorse him next? Cholera? 11 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Always protect your 'wand' when entering her 'Chamber of Secrets.' #dadquotes 22 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Taco Bell's operating hours are 9 A.M to 1 A.M. I understand feeding the drunkards at 1, but who the fuck eats Taco Bell for breakfast? 21 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Josh Wolford
Josh Wolford is a writer for WebProNews. He likes beer, Japanese food, and movies that make him feel weird afterward. Mostly beer. Follow him on Twitter: @joshgwolf Instagram: @joshgwolf Google+: Joshua Wolford StumbleUpon: joshgwolf