Star Jones AOL Love Coach;World Ends Tomorrow

    January 10, 2006
    WebProNews Staff

Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha bleeeyech! Sorry, just got finished reading this press release. Star Jones (Reynolds) is now offering her services as a “Love Coach” on America Online. Ha ha ha ha (–cheeks inflate to relive a past lunch–).

Star Jones Reynolds, co-host of testosterone-devoid daytime hen party, “The View,” has been enlisted by AOL to offer interactive workshops, tips, and advice for finding love. Perhaps AOL neglected to question one important aspect when researching who would make a good love coach-“Is this lady annoying? If so, how annoying is she?”

On a scale of one to Roseanne, definitely somewhere in the neighborhood of Madonna or Lindsay Lohan, with a 3 Chihuahua margin of error. Freeze-dried boredom is more interesting.

Reynolds joins a group of authors that includes the lauded Stephen Covey, author of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and John Gray, who wrote Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.

AOL describes its Coaches website as “an all-encompassing self-improvement website providing solutions and answers to people’s most pressing questions in the areas of diet and fitness, wellness, business and careers, money, kids and family, and now love and romance.”

What, Liz Taylor wasn’t available?

Count the clichs in following quote. Extra credit for pointing out an overreaching self-importance.

“As the new AOL Love Coach, I plan to provide women with advice, both entertaining and informative, that aims to answer the question, ‘Is Your Life As Good As It Gets?'” said Star.

“All women want to move their love-life from boring to brilliant and from sorry to shining. How do I know what works…because baby, I’ve been there…done that and bought a tee shirt! Trust me, finding real love is not a destination; it is a journey.”

Maybe Yahoo will come up with some counter programming for love-starved women called “What Not To Do.”