All Posts Tagged Tag: ‘funny’

The Cops Have Your Lost Cocaine, Please Facebook Message Them to Get It Back

If you happened to drop your bag of cocaine inside the Super Dollar on West Virginia Avenue in Crewe, Virginia on Tuesday, then you’re in luck! The cops have it. Just shoot them a message on Facebook and the whole thing will get straightened out.* It’s not a trap. Post by Crewe Police Department. According to Detective Ella Turner, who …

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Katy Perry, Drake, Lady Gaga Read Mean Tweets

Jimmy Kimmel’s best segment and one of the overall best bits on late night – mean tweets – has returned. This time, it’s the second-ever all-music edition, which features the likes of Josh Groban, Drake, Lady Gaga, Sam Smith, Jessie J, Blake Shelton, Haim, Wiz Khalifa, Ed Sheeran, Iggy Azalea, Pitbull, Sia, Childish Gambino, Britney Spears, Ariana Grande, Jason Aldean, …

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Man Turns Himself in After Facebook Promise to Police

In Canadian news, a Canadian man has gone full Canada and turned himself in to police after assuring them he would on Facebook. CTV News says that Rodney Constantine was wanted on four warrants, including failing to appear in court and breaching court orders. The Royal Newfoundland Constabulary, who operates rather prolific social media accounts, took to both Facebook and …

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90s Facebook Ad Is Hilarious Parody of Early AOL Ad

If Facebook would have come around in the mid-90s, you would’ve been burning through free trial discs like Fruit by the Foot. I know I would’ve. From comedian Brent Weinbach comes this damn-near-perfect parody of those old internet ads – but for a mysterious new product called “The Facebook”. Simply ship a few photographs to The Facebook, they’ll cover the …

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Florida Man Has Drugs, in Case You Were Wondering – the Police Sure Were

I’ve never tried to give someone a bag of meth in a Kmart, so I’m no expert on the matter. I have to imagine, however, that if I did decide to make that life decision – I’d wear the most literal T-shirt imaginable for the occasion. 50-year-old John Balmer sure did. According to the Pasco County Sheriff’s Office, Balmer was …

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Play-Doh in Damage Control Mode Over Toy That Very Much Resembles a Penis

Poor social media managers. One minute you’re thinking up cute ways to create brand-appropriate happy holiday messages and the next minute you’re furiously deleting images of little plastic penises. Play-Doh is in damage control mode on its social media accounts after some parents decided to complain about a particularly phallic toy that apparently traumatized their children and practically ruined Christmas …

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BBC Reporter Gets High From Second Hand Smoke

“Burning behind me is eight and half tons of heroin, opium, hashish and other narcotics… huehuehehe” elegantly guffawed BBC Reporter Quentin Sommerville. Like a dumpy Disney character, the journalist then told the cameraman in a slur to record another take, saying: “Come on… hehehe, let’s go.” It only got worse. The BBC’s Middle East correspondent then tried another take, only …

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Anna Kendrick Is Pretty Sure Letterman’s Cat Toy Is a Sex Toy

Anna Kendrick, no stranger to more risqué humor, tells it like it is. And that includes letting David Letterman know that cat toy is definitely no cat toy. Kendrick recently appeared on the Late Show and took no time in pointing out that a furry cat toy featured earlier on the show most certainly had other purposes. “Um, can I …

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South Dakota Yanks ‘Don’t Jerk and Drive’ Campaign

In of course the higher-ups are going to ruin a good thing news, a South Dakota highway safety campaign has been yanked after it went viral last week. As you may have heard, the South Dakota Office of Highway Safety decided to go full double-entendre with their new winter weather safe driving campaign, #DontJerkAndDrive. Jerking isn’t a joke, they said, …

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South Dakota Wants to Make Sure You Don’t Jerk and Drive

Either nobody at the South Dakota Office of Highway Safety is paying attention, or everybody there is really, really great. Simply top notch. This winter, if you feel your automobile begin to lose its grip on the road during icy conditions, the state of South Dakota wants to make sure you don’t jerk it. Jerking isn’t a joke, they say. …

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Celebrities Reading Mean Tweets Is Back and Better Than Ever

About two and a half years ago, Jimmy Kimmel premiered the first ever “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets” segment. We’re now up to #8 in the series, and this one might be the most brutal yet. Most of the time, the tweets that Kimmel and crew have the celebs read are pretty mean. They don’t really take it easy on anyone …

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Textaholic Granny Sends Family Motivational Text from the Grave

Everyone has their own way of coping with death and loss, and unless that coping mechanism is harmful to other, well, to each their own. If people want to grieve by texting their deceased loved ones, that’s perfectly ok. I mean, it’s really no different than going to a cemetery and ‘talking’ to them, right? While we could probably argue …

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