Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
The Land Before Timeline #FacebookFilms
Somewhere, Tom Cruise is sitting on a couch, quiet and still.
Sometimes I stay late at work just to eat other people’s desk candy without being judged.
“How to Lose Your Stock Value in 10 Days” #FacebookFilms
I can accurately remember when past events occured based solely on the size and shape of Matthew Perry in a ‘Friends’ rerun.
I will devote my entire life to Scientology if it turns out Katie Holmes is leaving Tom Cruise because he knocked up Adele.
It’s so hot my sweat turned red and started coming out my nose!
Tom Cruise and Katie are getting a divorce because she refused to go to Magic Mike with him
“Yo, Holmes smell ya later.” -Tom Cruise, pretending not to care
How many times you think Marcus Bachmann has seen ‘Magic Mike’ so far today?
Note to news editors: at this point, you don’t have to say why authorities have detained Snoop Dogg. It is well understood.
No Country for Old Admins #FacebookFilms