Thanksgiving, Turkeys, and Camouflage

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Thanksgiving, Turkeys, and Camouflage
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Today, in honor of the holiday, we have lot of tweets about Thanksgiving and Turkeys. There are a couple of other gems thrown in there as well.

    Enjoy!

    Happy Thanksgiving Eve. Remember, every time a Christmas tree is lit before Thanksgiving, an elf drowns a baby reindeer in eggnog. 6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Please give a round of applause for the people who stopped doing coke this week so they could enjoy dinner with family for Thanksgiving 15 minutes ago via Favstar.FM · powered by @socialditto

    It’s Thanksgiving, or as the Pilgrims called it, Occupy Someone Else’s Country. http://t.co/aqN3qrAC 20 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    #TheBestThingAboutThanksgiving: Impressing everyone by cutting the turkey with my lightsaber. 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Getting stuffed #TheBestThingAboutThanksgiving 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

    Turkeys are like investigative journalism: sometimes you gotta shove a carrot up that ass. 1 minute ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

    I’m not using Spotify. There’s no way I’m gonna let people know how many times a day I listen to Faith Evan’s “Love Like This Before.” 24 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    “I raised 23 foster turkeys.” ~Michele Bachmann 32 minutes ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    Spent the night outside a camping supply store waiting for Black Friday. Wish I had a tent and sleeping bag. 54 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

    “You mean I HAVE TO pardon it AND it’s not mentally retarded?!” – President Rick Perry on Thanksgiving 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    I wasn’t paying attention and bought Diet Mountain Dew instead of good Mountain Dew #firstworldproblems 1 hour ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto

    FYI wearing camouflage at your desk so no one sees you masturbating doesn’t work. 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Who do you think is more worried about tomorrow…..the turkeys or the Dolphins? 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

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