Lyndon McWhorter, Police Chief of Moulton, Ala., has announced the capture of bank robber Rickie Lawrence Gardner.

Don’t care?

That’s because Rickie Lawrence Gardner wasn’t really a bank robber. Gardner, age 49, was worried that he’d suffered a career-ending leg injury and was destined for the streets. “Three hots and a cot” sounded pretty good to a guy who was about to be out of hearth and home.

So he pulled up to the Bank Independent branch in Moulton, walked in, and offered up a note that said he had a weapon and wanted money. The clerk handed over roughly $4000 and Gardner walked out, put the cash in his car, locked the vehicle, and sat down on a bench to wait for the cops to arrive.

McWhorter said Gardner told authorities that he robbed the bank because he had hurt his leg and wasn’t able to take care of himself. “So,” said McWhorter, “he decided to get arrested to have a place to live and someone to take care of him.”

Arresting authorities report that he had no weapon on him other than a pocketknife but he believed that threatening the clerk with a hypothetical weapon would increase his jail time, hence a longer-term stay in the clink.

“When the officers got there, he was just sitting on the bench, waiting on them,” McWhorter said. “The money was locked up inside his truck, which was parked in the handicapped spot in front of the bank.”

For what it’s worth, his leg injury had warranted a handicap parking sticker, which probably won’t help him at sentencing if he’s looking for a long stay. “He had a handicap sticker on his vehicle so he even parked legal,” according to McWhorter.

Some family members are speculating that the pain medication that went along with the leg injury may have influenced Gardner’s actions.