Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Happy National Doughnut Day, Jabba’s favorite day of the year.
I think if you’ve been to the beach you know that every day is national donut day in America.
So who’s this “Miss Trial” that John Edwards is banging?
F.D.R. would have had a SHIT-TON of ‘NO FEAR’ t-shirts.
Just think how much worse the Hatfield McCoy feud would have been if they had texting. Or face eating.
As he exited the interview, Mayor Bloomberg slapped a large Mountain Dew out of the hand of a husky child. “It starts now,” he whispered.
Mayor McCheese should run against Bloomberg
If Thor smashes Bella Swan with his hammer then count me in for Snow White & the Huntsman.
I think what DC Comics meant to announce is that The Green Lantern is gayER than the other super heroes wearing tights and a cape.
Naming your daughter “Star” is the easiest way to insure that she won’t be one.
Microsoft’s new tagline: “Bing is the #1 search engine among people who always accept the default.” #newBing
Just saw a confused guy in the street, angrily shouting “Where is the best sushi!?!” at a metal object in his hand.
I find it difficult to watch porn in the same way a real prosecutor can’t watch Law & Order.
Kathie Lee Gifford just asked John Walsh of America’s Most Wanted how his son Adam is doing.


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