Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Breaking: Jessie’s girl turns out to be a real asshole.
This crowd wants more Bill Clinton. Unfortunately he headed out to the VMA’s to explain why Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart broke up.
“In case of emergency, break water.” – Fetuses
FACT CHECK: Obama “I’m the president.” THIS HAS BEEN VERIFIED, CARRY ON. #dnc2012
I hate when you reach the point that you recognize all of your co-workers’ pants.
All this “you can’t opt out of the ads in the new Kindle Fire” stuff ignores the fact that you can opt out of the new Kindle Fire.
Thanks to social media, our lives are less interesting than ever and we have more ways to share the evidence.
Part of me will be sad when Rihanna dies and part of me will be glad to see Chris Brown go to the electric chair
“I have an idea for a new kind of screwdriver.” -Phillip
Another earthquake hit LA last night, didn’t even have the decency to hit the VMAs.
I am definitely better off than I was four beers ago.