After waiting for more than a year to get to kiss her intended Ben Seewald, Jessa Duggar surprised everyone in attendance at her wedding by not kissing him there, either.

The Duggar family, famous for their reality TV series 19 Kids and Counting, are well-known to have very specific and stringent rules regarding morality and intimate behavior outside of marriage.

For Jessa and Ben, there were rules that they agreed to up front in their courtship. Father Jim Bob Duggar explained why the family thinks those rules are important.

“As far as our kids dating, we believe a lot of times if you’re alone with a person, it can create desires that can kind of get stirred up, and you don’t have any accountability, and [that] can lead to some hanky panky,” he explained.

“Dad allowed them to do a side hug when they were officially courting,” Jessa’s mom Michelle said. “Jessa and Ben have said that was the only contact they would have, when they initially greet each other, when he comes to visit for their first hello, they have a quick 30 second or less side hug and a goodbye side hug and they agreed that would be the only contact they should have.”

“They want to wait on the physical relationship until later,” she explained. “If there is an engagement that comes about, they will work together on their goals and standards for that.”

Apparently part of the “goals and standards” for their engagement was that they would not even kiss until the wedding ceremony culmination, when the minister tells them they can.

Michelle says of her first kiss with dad Jim Bob, “We did not save our first kiss for our wedding day, and we really regret that we didn’t. We really should have.”

So the day came, the moment arrived when everyone would get to see Jessa and Ben have their first kiss. But they did not kiss then, either!

While sister Jill had her first kiss with husband Derrick Dillard at their wedding, Jessa and Ben chose to keep that moment between themselves.

In a reality TV culture where Kim and Kanye reveal to everyone when and where their daughter was conceived, keeping something to yourself because you want to is actually kind of refreshing.