Google Glasses, Flying Cars, and Walkmans

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Google Glasses, Flying Cars, and Walkmans
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Enjoy!

    I want those Google Glasses so badly, but I also want to date women. Choices.(image) 2 hours ago via Twitterrific for Mac ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Joe Flacco says “I think I’m the best QB in the NFL.” Unibrow nation is feeling BOLD under Anthony Davis’ leadership.(image) 6 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Since Droid users get to be on Instagram now iPhone users should get to have food stamps.(image) 8 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Whether you’re a fan of “Dancing with the Stars” or “The Voice,” it’s clear this has been a very tough week, so, thank GOD you hoard cats.(image) 14 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    American Voices: Flying Car A Reality | “I don?t see the point of these unless there?s a floating Taco Bell.” http://t.co/oHNKm6cL(image) 22 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Obama has called the GOP budget social Darwinism. Nice try, but they believe in social creationism.(image) 5 hours ago via SocialOomph ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    “I wish I could answer phone calls with my Walkman” -Steve Jobs in the 80’s.(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Santorum is like MySpace: he technically still exists but no one cares.(image) 5 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Keith Olbermann has a huge head.(image) 15 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Easter is the time when everyone on Dancing With The Stars celebrates being resurrected from the dead.(image) 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    It breaks my heart to think about those glasses of wine that white women forgot to photograph and upload to a social media website.(image) 50 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Watching MTVs Skrillex Unplugged. He’s just eating a ham sandwich onstage.(image) 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Yahoo! announced that it’s firing 2000 employees. At least their resumes will look happy and excited.(image) 2 hours ago via WitStream ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    It’s hard to accurately observe Daylight Saving Hammertime when you can’t touch the clock to set it forward.(image) 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

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