Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Sad news: the press release announcing Burger King’s new bacon sundae has just succumbed to diabetes.
This was the Rangers’ last chance to win the Stanley Cup before Bloomberg bans it. They’ll have to hand the team two smaller Cups.
I like my skittles like I like my women; tropical, and in a bag.
Goodfella, Henry Hill has died. Should be a few good write ups in tomorrows papers, tomorrows papers.
Apple is shutting down Ping. Apparently “social graphs” do better with people.
Pretty much any fast food slogan works just as well for heroin.
Burger King’s introduces bacon sundae as Michelle Obama cries a single tear.
Lindsay Lohan to receive one of the first Google Cars programmed to drive itself into a guard rail.
What’s so sad about dying penniless? I call that perfect money management.
How about an AA membership? “@snooki: Should I get a Pinterest page or a Google + account?”
I will never get as excited about anything as computer solitaire gets when I win
If you’re in Vegas and a father and in need a new pair of sneakers you should: A) Be at home and B) Not announce it to a table of strangers