Vampire skeletons have been unearthed in Bulgaria, according to Channel News Asia. Before you get your hopes up that remains of actual vampires have finally been discovered, nothing conclusive about the existence of blood-suckers in that region has been confirmed. All scientists have found thus far are a couple of bodies with rods shoved through their chests, a practice which was thought to prevent “bad people” from clawing their way out of the graveyard.

According to legend, individuals with a propensity towards evil were magically transformed into vampires upon their death. If an iron or wooden rod wasn’t inserted directly into their chest, effectively pinning them to the ground, these people would rise from their graves around midnight with one thing on their mind: to terrorize any and all living beings who were unfortunate enough to stumble into their path.

Bozhidar Dimitrov, the head of the national history museum, discovered the remains in the town of Sozopol, which is located near the Black Sea. Regarding the discovery, Dimitrov explained, “These two skeletons stabbed with rods illustrate a practice which was common in some Bulgarian villages up until the first decade of the 20th century.”

Roughly 100 similar burials have been discovered in the country already.

In other words, if you suspect that your mean, ugly Uncle Ronny has the potential to become a savage, blood-drinking creature of the night upon his death, grab the nearest broomstick or fireplace poker and pin that guy to his coffin as soon as possible. I’m only kidding, of course. Everyone knows that vampires don’t die, and that they secretly dwell in suburban neighborhoods. At least that’s what Hollywood has taught me, anyway.