Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today we participate in a popular trending topic of the day, #SnookisNewYearsResolutions. We also find out the best show about hoarders and see an easy way to win an ugly Christmas sweater contest.
Almost done building my Nativity scene. Just need to find a tiny Tim Tebow.
R. Kelly said that he has written 32 new chapters of “Trapped In the Closet.” It’s 2011, just come out of the closet already.
It’s cool now, but for the other 11 months, “Do You Hear What I Hear?” is a sad tale of paranoid schizophrenia.
Does anyone know if Ben Roethlisberger can still rape with that high ankle sprain?
#MarioSays “Don’t eat the flowers. They give me bad heartburn.”
The story of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer teaches us that being different is bad, until someone popular likes you. Just like Twitter.
My favorite show about hoarders is 19 Kids And Counting.
You know you have a lot of tattoos when you can win an ugly Christmas sweater contest by going shirtless.
#SnookisNewYearsResolutions to fall down on every beach in Jersey.
Why do people still believe in Me?
Because I’m too big to fail.
#SnookisNewYearsResolutions get a job interview at Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory.
#SnookisNewYearsResolutions GLT = Get Legs Together