Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
If you’re having a good day today, it’s probably because all the douchebags you know are at the Apple Store.
I missed this week’s episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo,” so I just hung out at a Walmart for 30 minutes to get the same experience.
first Mitt Romney, now Paris Hilton. Now we just need a secret recording of someone we didn’t already hate.
Maybe Kato Kaelin and Monica Lewinsky could get married and settle down together in Irrelevant-ville
I’ll be “releasing my taxes” a little later today.
The Day The Music Was Completely Unaffected. #LMFAO
Hey cool! Apple Maps claims there’s a shortcut to the East Indies if I sail through the Western hemisphere.
reading “ulysses” on a kindle at starbucks makes you twelve kinds of dick.
Why do all cats have that same weird accent?
My burrito’s tortilla ripped so now I have to eat it with a fork. #FirstWorldProblems
If I had to choose between being blind or being deaf, that would be terrible.