Holly Madison Considered Suicide During Days With Hugh Hefner

Kimberly RipleyLife

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Holly Madison talks about her life as a Playboy bunny and one of Hugh Hefner's girlfriends in a new memoir. Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny tells a story that isn't all excitement and luxury, however. In fact, it highlights some of the darkest days Holly Madison ever experienced.

In a press release for Entertainment Tonight, the memoir is described as follows:

"...What seemed like a fairytale life inside the Playboy Mansion—including A-list celebrity parties and her own #1-rated television show for four years—quickly devolved into an oppressive routine of strict rules, manipulation, and battles with ambitious, backstabbing bunnies," the release reads.

"Life inside the notorious Mansion wasn't a dream at all—and quickly became her nightmare. After losing her identity, her sense of self-worth, and her hope for the future, Holly found herself sitting alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide," it continues.

"In this shockingly candid and surprisingly moving memoir, this thoughtful and introspective woman opens up about life inside the Mansion, the drugs, the sex, the abuse, the infamous parties, and her real behind-the-scenes life with Bridget [Marquardt], Kendra [Wilkinson], and, of course, Mr. Playboy himself."

One would never have suspected during Holly Madison's heyday in the Playboy mansion that life was so incredibly different behind closed doors. It makes one wonder if some types of sexual abuse might not have taken place, too.

Fortunately for Holly Madison, life is much different these days. She is married to Pasquale Rotella, and is the mom of a little girl named Rainbow.

Will you be picking up a copy of Holly Madison's memoir? It certainly sounds like a lot went on in the Playboy mansion that might be divulged within the pages of her book. Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny goes on sale June 23rd.

Kimberly Ripley
Kimberly Ripley is a freelance writer and published author from Portsmouth, New Hampshire. A wife, mom of five and 'Nana' to Lilly and Aiden, she loves cooking for her big family and watching HGTV in her spare time. Kim is guilty of starting way more home design projects than she can finish. Visit her at Twitter and Facebook.