Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today Twitter is ablaze with tweets about the Conrad Murray verdict. We also learn what you can do if your don’t want to fly from Boston to New York, and we see the difference between boxing fans and football fans.
I look at people sometimes and think..”For real? That’s the sperm that won?”
It’s official: Herman Cain has now harassed more women than Godfather’s Pizza has customers.
Changed my pet turkey’s diet to high carb, high fat, milkshake diet. He thinks I love him…
CORRECTION: “American Horror Story” and “Jerseylicious” are actually two different shows. Adjust reviews accordingly.
If you don’t want to fly from Boston to New York, you can always drive on the Pats defense.
“This rape beverage keeps backfiring!”
— the plot of Tone Loc’s “Funky Cold Medina”
The hardest part of having a cold is slyly working the fact that I have a cold into every sentence.
With how much we girls talk about our emotions, you’d think we’d be able to handle them better.
It’s nice how all of the people outside the courthouse during the reading of the Dr. Conrad Murray verdict were given the day off of work.
Boxing fans more charitable than football fans as some offer to donate liver to Joe Frazier but none offer balls to Jay Cutler.
“You should have moved to Florida Dr. Murray.” – Casey Anthony
Anytime Ben Roethlisberger loses an angels gets their wings
The Penn State & Conrad Murray stories confuse me.
Are we supposed to help child molesters or kill them???