You know you’ve reached an impressive pinnacle of popularity when folks are going all out to produce a rap video for the intellectual property in question. By “going all out,” I mean complete with costumes, full-on makeup, and a setting that looks it’s from a medieval era. The videos in question were made by a who’s who of gamer geeks who enjoy successful existences as minor YouTube celebrities.
Of course, the reason you’re hear is to enjoy songs where the performers rap about Skyrim, and with that in mind, here are the two versions of the Skyrim “Gangster Rap” song, starting with the clean version:
Now for the uncensored version:
As you can see, the song(s) take familiar things in Skyrim–Fus Do Dah, giants and their toes, fighting Storm Cloak Imperials–you know, everyday Skyrim stuff. While the first two verses are fine enough, the song hits its stride when Aela the Huntress comes in and brings everything home with a flow that’s more impressive then someone like me would expect. For those who are wondering, Aela was played by a YouTuber who goes by the “Dodger” handle. For those interested in
For those who are really feeling the song, you can actually buy it at iTunes (this link goes to the explicit version) as well.
If you’re wondering how the song/video was received by the audience, the following numbers should clarify things. Between the two versions, there have been over 100,000 views in about a week. Combined, the likes outnumber the dislikes 3854 to 434. Clearly, people are still in a Skyrim kind of mood. And just because you know you want them, here are the lyrics for the clean version. The explicit lyrics can be found here.
Skyrim Lyrics by Rawn
Everywhere I go they like
WAIT I know you
Im the DragonBorn Bitch
Just tell me where to go to
I GOT Skooma in my cup
VIP at the winking Skeever
Hacking Dragons up
Like a butcher with a Cleaver
Dawnstar to Falkreath
Markarth to Riften
The Wars Amidst and
these Nords won’t Listen
Dragons coming back to burn us to a Crisp
and
I be Rippin through these women
Like a Dwarven Piston.
StormCloak Imperial
Silverhand Orc
my armor so heavy
Your swords Like a Spork
I rock them scales
Claws sharp like nails
got you looking looking snowman
with my frosty spells
(CHORUS)
I’m the dovahkiin man
dova dovakiin
you can’t be like me with that arrow in the knee Jarl of the town in yo Fine Clothes
I be stealin that crown
In my archmage robes
Sharpen that axe
better Read them tomes
You looking like Parthanaax
Shit so old
I pick a pocket Quick you know
I Grip that GOLD
I take apart your crypt
yeah I flip them bones
I cause mass hysteria I
Spit Scrolls
Summoning up a Daedra with the sanguine rose
you know i take down giants just to steal their toes
why you cryin’ Let me guess Someone stole your Sweet Roll
(CHORUS)
I’m the dovahkiin man
dova dovakiin
you can’t be like me with the arrow in the knee
(AELA THE HUNTRESS)
Im Aela the Huntress
Ill be your companion
Wolf in Sheeps clothes so
Better keep your pants on
I go at it hands on
Wanna be my shield brother
better be Handsome
Sneakin like a phantom in my
BOOTS WITH THE FURR
You don’t need to put a ring on it
Amulet of Mara
Spittin bars like a bard
Steel Hard Sky Forge
Got the blood of the beast
and the heart of A NORD
Got the Art of the Sword
Got Block like a ward
Fought em off in the war
Emperor hit the Floor
Got the mask and the staff of the priest that was blockin the way to the crypt where the draugers were walking your listening when the night mother is talking you spending them souls on them shouts you unlocking
you carrying to much to run
Thats why you Walkin.
(CHORUS)
I’m the dovahkiin man
dova dovakiin
you can’t be like me with that arrow in the knee
Aela for the win. Everything else pales in comparison.