Prop 8, Google Maps, and Louis Vuitton Condoms

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Prop 8, Google Maps, and Louis Vuitton Condoms
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Enjoy!

    So…Prop. 8 ruling *and* Santorum surge on the same Tuesday? Oh mama universe, you funny. 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Think of all the witches Rick Santorum would’ve burned had he been alive in the 1600s. 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    E-mailed PR pitches I didn’t finish reading: “Happy Hump Day!” 1 hour ago via MetroTwit ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    “There is no gawd.” -teen athiest 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    If Rick Santorum becomes our nominee – it will be the first really significant evidence I’ve seen that the Mayans might be right about 2012. 5 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    I hope someone else’s life flashes before my eyes when I die, because otherwise BOR-RING. 1 hour ago via Tweetbot for iOS ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Another Robin died today. Apparently it’s hard to hear Joker sneaking up behind you when your earbuds are blasting Kelly Clarkson. 1 hour ago via Batcomputer ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    It is acceptable to refer to all court proceedings as a “trial,” because seriously, you ever sat through one of those things? 2 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Google Maps satellite view is great because you can pretend that you’re flying while you stalk people. 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    My child prefers Dreamworks to Pixar. #FirstWorldProblems 2 hours ago via iTweet for Android ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    I can’t watch ‘Luck’ or ‘Game of Thrones’ because my dog barks at any horse that appears on screen. #whitepitbullproblems 3 hours ago via TweetDeck ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    “You can’t have your cake and eat it too.” -guy very confused about what cake is 3 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    If you see the word “Catholic” in a headline, you know it’s bad news. 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Louis Vuitton condoms. Now people can enjoy their partners blowing it all on Louis Vuitton. 14 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

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