Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Today, Twitter was aflutter with a wide range of topics, including Pat Sajak’s shocking revelation, and Arizona Governor Jan Brewer’s shocking finger wave. We also participate in the trending hashtag #WoodyAllenHorrorMovies.
Pat Sajak cops to being behind the Wheel (of Fortune) while intoxicated. So what? For 6 years I hosted Hollywood Squares with no pants.
Pat Sajak admits to hosting Wheel of Fortune while intoxicated. Big deal, I hosted an entire season of Idol without a soul
Millions of people drink at work and Pat Sajak is the only one to get a news story. Looks like the 99% loses again.
To honor the memory of Joe Paterno, Jerry Sandusky observed a minute of silent horsing around in the shower.
#GivesYouWings, Adderall is at least a jetpackIf Red Bull
Jan Brewer: “I hope [Obama] takes some of the lessons of Arizona back with him to Washington.” Yeah, like more funding for mental health.
Pat Sajak admits to hosting Wheel of Fortune drunk. Pretty soon Vanna White will admit to never sitting next to Nelly on an airplane.
That Jan Brewer is a card. Someone put their finger in my face once. I fired him then ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.
When “Jan Brewer” trends on twitter, I usually guess she’s either found headless bodies or is doing something racist or both.
We’re all mature until somebody brings out the bubble-wrap.
Now can we all finally agree that “Sajacked” is the best possible euphemism for getting wasted?
On behalf of Neil Young I’d like to declare total victory over Lynyrd Skynyrd.