Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Hebrew National sued over non-kosher allegations. On the plus side, their pigs are raised under very humane conditions.
Kids who raise their hands enthusiastically become adults who write letters to the editor.
Drinking alcohol makes me an alcoholic. So does drinking Fanta make me fantastic?
Snapple’s made from “The Best Stuff on Earth.” Really? Heroin-laced Nutella?
It’s crazy to think that Kirstie Alley probably deep-fried and ate a lamp today.
Alec Baldwin punched a photographer, a man thinks women aren’t funny & Johnny Depp is single again. I’ll take ‘Headlines from 1988’ for $600
So tired of getting emails inviting me to see “Abraham: LinkedIn Vampire Hunter”
Now that the bank has officially foreclosed on her home, Octomom is free to pursue her lifelong dream of living in a shoe.
Amazing how animals can “sense” that an earthquake is coming, or that your penis is inside them.
MIke Tyson called himself a “Prostitute Hunter” on the Today Show. Time to turn that into a show, TNT
Might start making my own smoothies so I can bring that up as a way of ending conversations.
You guys it’s hotter than a Meat Lover’s pizza delivered by Kate Upton in a ’96 Saturn station wagon without air conditioning out here.