Kansas Governor Can't Stop Facebook 'Sarcasm Bombing'

These politicians. Some of these people really struggle to handle a public page on Facebook. Take Kansas Governor Sam Brownback.

He’s vowed to sign into law the onerous “No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act” – a bill he freely admits that he has not read – that would permit doctors to withhold information from patients, force women to hear the fetal heartbeat prior to an abortion procedure, and contains the absolutely bananas provision that would require doctors to lie to women by telling them that abortions would increase the risk of breast cancer.

As a result of his willfully blind determination to sign the bill, the governor’s Facebook account has been swarmed with a wave of “sarcasm bombing,” a new phenomenon consisting of coordinated trolling en masse, wherein commenters mocked Governor Brownback by facetiously addressing him as some kind of women’s health expert. Here are a few of the gems left by the bombers (hat tip to Kate Freeman at Mashable for catching these):

“Hi Sam- I had sex with my wife and she didn’t get pregnant. I’m here to turn her in.”

“I just called your office, and they wouldn’t let me schedule a pap smear. I’m confused, aren’t you taking care of all this now?”

“Hey Governor Brownback, I was considering going on birth control because I’m fed up with being a teacher who has acne. Which one would you recommend for this?”

“UPDATE: My wife changed her pad. You may resume regular activities. Thanks again for caring so much, Sam.”

While Brownback does appear to have deleted these comments from his wall, that seems to have only emboldened the bombers, who have now moved to simply continuing the posts in the comment sections of unrelated wall posts made by Brownback. After all, when you cause this much of a stink, you’re not gonna be able to shoo away all the flies.

In a wall post titled, “Lt. Gov. Colyer: Legislative Oversight Essential to Providing Highest Quality of Services under KanCare,” which is a press release about the state’s Medicaid program, some people responded with highly related comments like:

“Does ‘highest quality of services” mean the chastity belts are all sterilized and wrapped in bubble wrap?”

“And can I get pregnant from having sex with my boyfriend? I know I’m a guy but there must be a way…”

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aVaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavaginaVaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina.”

“Can you use the word concept in a press release? It sounds too much like conception, and that should be left to our LORD and Savior Jesus Christ, AMEN.”

“what douche can you recommend?”

“Governor, I think I am getting my period what do you think?”

In a different wall post related to the grand opening of Cabela’s, a retailer of hunting and other outdoorsy supplies, in Wichita this past Wednesday, bombers mused with very relevant comments like:

“It is the woman’s duty to have pregnancies–and mans duty to ensure that all their hard work is not for naught. Who cares about possible harm to the woman. They should buck up and accept their duty.”

“Did this event feature a birth control symposium too? I hear that asprin was talked about quite a lot.”

“The Bible lists women among property not to be coveted – if they’re not filling their role as part of a man’s belongings, what are they good for?”

“Can we buy the burkas in many colors or do they only come in black? I really don’t look good in black at all.”

“Is science real?”

It just keeps going on from there and the most recent comment I saw was from as recently as five minutes ago.

Meanwhile, some poor staffer will assuredly be assigned the undesirable task of cleaning up Governor Brownback’s Faceback page. Good luck stemming that tide, kiddo.

Kansas Governor Can’t Stop Facebook ‘Sarcasm Bombing’

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