Let’s say you have a few too many and make the decision to get behind the wheel. Ok, you’ve already made a mistake. But just for the sake of argument, let’s allow you to continue on your journey.

Next, you hit a car. Ouch, you’re pretty screwed now. Better wait for the police and take your lumps…wait, no? Ok, so you’re going to drive off? Alright, I guess a hit-and-run is just another charge to add to your list. Maybe you can make it home without anyone noticing.

Phew, you made it home. That was crazy, right? Better not speak of it…oh, you’re on Facebook, huh? Cool. Whatcha doin..wait…no. Don’t do that. For the love of god don’t…

According to Astoria, Oregon police, 18-year-old Jacob Cox-Brown, like many other 18-year-olds, had an exciting New Year’s Eve. So exciting, in fact, that he drunkenly sideswiped two cars in the early morning hours of January 1st.

How do they know this? Facebook, of course!

Here’s what Cox-Brown had to say on Facebook just a couple hours after the alleged incident:

Classsic!

Police were notified of the post, and decided to investigate. They went to Cox-Brown’s house and found his vehicle, which had clear damage that matched those of the cars involved in the hit-and-run.

According to Portland’s KGW,

“Cox-Brown was charged with two counts of failing to perform the duties of a driver. Deputy Chief Brad Johnston said the teen was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.”

Idiot.

[KGW via Gizmodo]