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Diablo 3, Walruses, and Celebrity Twitter Passwords

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Diablo 3, Walruses, and Celebrity Twitter Passwords
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Enjoy!

    To everyone who can’t play Diablo 3 until after work, the starving children in Africa started a Facebook page for you.(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Diablo 3 and Max Payne 3 came out today. Unless your boss follows you on Twitter, in which case A Bad Case of the Flu came out today.(image) 3 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    i think the show ” America’s Got Talent ” should have a question mark at the end of it.(image) 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    A juror lost interest and fell asleep during the Roger Clemens trial. That’s why baseball players started taking steroids in the 1st place.(image) 30 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    #CelebrityTwitterPasswords
    Tim Tebow : Wanted his password to be “pass” but it was too short.(image) 40 minutes ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Chernobyl. Please, Chernobyl RT @KimKardashian: If Khloe & I take a city what city should it be???(image) 14 hours ago via Echofon ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    The scale adds ten pounds.(image) 1 hour ago via Echofon ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    When “The Voice” goes off air, the spinning chairs return to their day jobs: Bringing mad villains face to face with James Bond(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Dear Humans, Please don’t grab our tongues when we’re licking your hands. It freaks us out. Love, Dogs(image) 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    My polarized sunglasses make my smartphone’s screen look weird. #FirstWorldProblems(image) 5 hours ago via iTweet for Android ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Reports confirm that Heat F Chris Bosh has indeed name his son Littlefoot.(image) 6 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    A walrus is just a seal with a porn mustache.(image) 12 hours ago via Favstar.FM ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    It’s easy to make fun of Kmart, but at least their clothes don’t just assume you have human features.(image) 12 hours ago via WitStream ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

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