The deep fried fair food on the menu at this year’s California State Fair will probably test the limits of those individuals who believe their stomach is constructed of cast iron. Once upon I time, I could stuff just about anything into my gaping maw and walk away from the experience without much gastrointestinal trauma. As I’ve gotten older, however, the very thought of consuming chocolate-covered bacon is enough to make me reach for a big ol’ bottle of Pepto.
Over 100 vendors will be peddling their edible wares at the California State Fair, which runs from July 12th through the 29th. Some of the entrees that will be made available to adventurous foodies include the Big Beef Rib (essentially, a big ass 24-ounce steak jammed onto a 17-inch cow rib), a deep-fried cheeseburger (complete with jalapeno cheese), and, last but not least, a pork chop on a stick. The last one is probably the most palatable to those who aren’t really in the mood for something that will obliterate their bowels in a matter of seconds.
For those of you with big appetites, you can also get a few unusual side items at this year’s event. Some of the dishes vying for your cash include deep-fried mac ‘n’ cheese on a stick, deep-fried cream cheese topped with sweet-hot sauce, deep-fried cheese curds, and a brick of curly fries, the latter of which sounds heavenly, just heavenly. For dessert, why not try your hand at a deep-fried cinnamon rolls with icing or, perhaps, a deep-fried red velvet cake with frosting.
Of course, the California State Fair isn’t the only place you can find ridiculous deep fried foods. Other fairs throughout the country offer all sorts of gross-out menu items, including deep-fried butter, deep-fried alligator, deep-fried Oreos, deep-fried brownies, and — wait for it — deep-fried Krispy Kreme cheeseburgers. According to the Huffington Post, deep-fried Kool-Aid ball creator Charlie Boghosian has unleashed his latest creation: deep-fried cereal.
Unless it comes with deep-fried milk, I think I’m good.