Colonel Sanders May Prefer The White Meat, But He Loves The Gays

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Although we're not entirely sure of Mike Huckabee's true intentions for scheduling a national "shove your face with Chick-fil-A" day, it's happening today, all the same. Around the country, millions of people are lining up to buy a spicy chicken sandwich and some waffle fries to show their support during Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day.

Why would Chick-fil-A need their own impromptu appreciation day? Well, unless you've been living under a rock you're probably aware of the pounding the company has taken lately because of their President's outspoken criticism of gay marriage. Those comments (although rather unsurprising to most) prompted a strong backlash from marriage equality supporters, some of which called for boycotts.

Honestly, I'm sure that most of the population would just as soon advocate that everyone shuts the hell up as they would pick a position either way.

But both sides of the controversy are fired up. The Chick-fil-A haters are simply standing up for what they feel is a universal social injustice and a company that perpetuates it. Or perhaps they're just showing that they can be as intolerant toward others' beliefs as the intolerance that they rail against.

The Chick-fil-A supporters have held their ground against those who would attempt to chastise a company for promoting good Christian values. Or maybe it's the company's right to free speech in the form of donations that draws their support. Perhaps they are just close minded bigots falling rather ungracefully on the wrong side of history.

Whatever the case, the Colonel doesn't give a sh*t. KFC loves the gays, or maybe they just love your money. Either way, they want to take Chick-fil-A's business.

Check out this Funny or Die sketch featuring John Goodman in the role he was born to play - Colonel Sanders:

Josh Wolford
Josh Wolford is a writer for WebProNews. He likes beer, Japanese food, and movies that make him feel weird afterward. Mostly beer. Follow him on Twitter: @joshgwolf Instagram: @joshgwolf Google+: Joshua Wolford StumbleUpon: joshgwolf