Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Enjoy!
Planking #RejectedScoutBadges
Happy Friday the 13th, if you’re thinking about joining the Dark Side, today is a great day for it.
70% of Bill Cosby’s jokes are just dubstep tracks.
I saw a very old woman & a very young man eat bananas on the subway this morning. I don’t need to read 50 Shades of Grey anymore.
I just acquired Flickr for $250 cash and a free car wash.
#Rejectedscoutbadges First Kill
Transform any allergy attack into appearing stoned by holding an open bag of your favorite snack.
Just remember, Paula Deen is talking about wieners every time she drawls “big stick of butterrrrr.”
Kristen Stewart is what would happen if a Yawn took human form & got really into Snow Patrol.
When life gives you high fructose corn syrup, citric acid, simulated flavors, potassium benzoate, gum arabic, and yellow 5, make lemonade.
Please remember to spay or neuter your spirit animal.
MILF Spotting #RejectedScoutBadges
