Although presently living the clean life, actress and comedian Amy Poehler reveals some hard truths about her past in her forthcoming memoir, Yes, Please.
“I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated,” Poehler states in a chapter entitled Obligatory Drug Stories. “Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don’t know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It’s bad for almost everything else…The day after cocaine is rough.”
The 43-year-old also admits that she dabbled with ecstasy, or “Molly.”
“I remember a wonderful UCB [United Citizens Brigade] New Year’s Eve party where we all danced and drank water and loved each other,” she writes. “I also remember the next day when I thought I had no friends and I was so sad I wanted to sink into the carpet and permanently live there.”
But the hardest part for Poehler was the morning after.
“The next day is the thing I can’t pull off anymore,” she admits. “How do you explain to a 4- and 6-year-old that you can’t play Rescue Bots because you have to spend all day in bed eating Cape Cod potato chips and watching The Bicycle Thief?”
Now single with two sons, the Parks and Recreation star sticks to marijuana, but even that is limited.
“I can’t perform, drive, or write stoned, and therefore I smoke pot a lot less than I used to.”
In September 2012, Poehler and ex-husband Will Arnett announced their divorce after ten years of marriage. This also “sucks” she said.
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“Imagine spreading everything you care about on a blanket and then tossing the whole thing up in the air. The process of divorce is about loading that blanket, throwing it up, watching it all spin, and worrying what stuff will break when it lands.”
The details of their split are “too sad” and “too personal” for her to talk about in public, but Poehler says that she is proud of her ex.
“I am proud of how my ex-husband Will and I have been taking care of our children,” she says. “I am beyond grateful he is their father, and I don’t think a ten-year marriage constitutes failure.”
Nowadays Poehler is dating comedian Nick Kroll.
— Erin McGann (@emcgann11) October 14, 2014
“I have a boyfriend who knows how to settle me,” she says. “He puts his hand on my chest and tells me boring stories…
“On one of our first nights together I woke up apologizing for my snoring and he pulled out two earplugs he had worn to bed so he could hear what I was saying. It was one of the most romantic gestures I have ever seen.”
Yes, Please will be available on October 28.