Vampire Hunters, Gatorade, and Disappointing YouTube Videos
Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
Jazz in my Pants #DisappointingYoutubeVideos
The only thing more humiliating for Skip Bayless right now would be if Mark Cuban bought ESPN and then fired him.
Do not blow kisses to loved ones. Ghosts intercept them mid-flight and put them on their butts.
It’s fitting that LeBron James wins an NBA Championship and the Finals MVP title where only 3/4 of the actual season was played.
Chocolate stain #DisappointingYouTubeVideos
Dear Liam Neeson: A seagull just took my Wetzel’s Pretzel. Gonna need you to get bloody on this one. Half now, half on completion.
Today is a beautiful day to squat over a mirror and be humbled.
Jerry Sandusky is the only person that John Edwards can openly talk shit about.
Lightning is just God instagramming.
Nyan Catfish #DisappointingYouTubeVideos
I drink Gatorade because I exercise a lot going to the fridge to get Gatorade.
It’s crazy how asparagus makes your pee smell funny but taste exactly the same
‘Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter’ just shows that Republicans have always been hateful toward alternative lifestyles.