Quantcast

Lindsay Lohan, Party City, and Skydiving

Today's Funniest Tweets

Get the WebProNews Newsletter:


Lindsay Lohan, Party City, and Skydiving
[ Life]

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Enjoy!

Facebook now has 901 million users and all of them have invited me to play FarmVille.(image) 7 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I think metta world peace should change his name to holy flying elbow(image) 7 hours ago via Twitterrific ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

BREAKING: In Possible Gaffe, Romney Offers Rubio Job at his House(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

If you ever take one of those “Which Game of Thrones character are you?” quizzes and your results say “Joffrey” go put your head in an oven.(image) 5 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

The later years, I assume. RT @AP: Lindsay Lohan to portray Elizabeth Taylor in a Lifetime film about her love affair with Richard Burton(image) 34 minutes ago via TweetDeck ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

If your laundry smells like fire and stale beer, you win at weekends.(image) 4 hours ago via TweetCaster for Android ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

James Harrison should expect to receive a fine for that hit James Harden took from Metta World Peace.(image) 19 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Monday mornings are a lot like getting kicked in the balls.(image) 9 hours ago via HootSuite ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

If I spend another dollar at Taco Bell I deserve a Mexican passport.(image) 35 minutes ago via TweetCaster for Android ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

It’s pretty strange that Party City is such a boring place to hang out.(image) 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Elizabeth Taylor is going to be perfect as Lindsay Lohan.(image) 11 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I’ve never skydived but I’ve checked Twitter on my phone while standing over a toilet. So, I get the gist.(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Lindsay Lohan, Party City, and Skydiving
Comments Off
Top Rated White Papers and Resources

Comments are closed.

  • Join for Access to Our Exclusive Web Tools
  • Sign Up For The Free Newsletter