Kellen Winslow Arrested After Having Solo Sex

    January 18, 2014
    Jasmine Allen
    Comments are off for this post.

New details have developed in regards to former New York Jet’s football athlete, Kellen Winslow, who was arrested on November 19 for smoking synthetic marijuana outside of a New Jersey Target parking lot.

It appears that the 30-year-old was doing more than just getting high.

According to a female witness who was parked next to Winslow’s vehicle, she reported to police that he was in his car masturbating.

The police report states:

“As she exited her vehicle, she commented to the male regarding how cold it was. As she stood near the open driver side window of the Escalade, she observed the males [sic] erect penis. She stated that she believed he was masturbating. [The woman] provided a written statement regarding her account.”

When police arrived to the scene, they found him initially slouched in his seat, but his genitals were not exposed.

Winslow explained to police that he got lost while searching for a Boston Market, but evidence showed otherwise.

Multiple bags and bottles of synthetic marijuana were found in Winslow’s vehicle. What appeared to be two open containers of Vaseline on his console were also found at the time of his arrest.

Winslow, who says the online-bought drug helps him relax, was charged with possession of a synthetic marijuana called fubinaca.

The original crime was listed as lewdness on the police report, but the 58-year-old eyewitness never came forth to sign documentation confirming the crime. Therefore, since the police did not witness the incident themselves, the initial offense got thrown out the window all together.

In a Twitter statement by his publicist Denise White, she insists that masturbation did not play apart in his arrest:

Just a week prior to his run in with law, the athlete was placed back on the team following a four-game suspension due to positive results on a drug test.

On Dec. 30, he appeared in court for the November 19 charge. It is said that he is now a free agent and will not be returning to the Jets.

Here’s a report done by The Fumble:

Here’s a satirical video on the incident:

Image via Youtube

  • Wow

    I find all of this to be really funny. America is the weirdest country. Everything in this country is about sex. Pretty much every show, magazine ad, and movie has sex in it. The teenage girls look 10 years older than they are and they are having sex like crazy, yet America denies it. Affairs are rampant. Porn use is very high. Heck, there are so many women in the country doing porn, web cams, and homemade sex tapes. The evidence is all around us. America is just sex obsessed. Yet, we deny it all. In public, every one is a prude. In private, people are doing everything. We think sex is evil and condemn it. Yet, everyone is doing it. I know a guy who is sitting in prison for having underage sex with his girlfriend. She didn’t press charges. She writes him every month. No harm was done. Yet, there he sits and will sit for a decade. America is the only country that will create suffering from a situation where no harm was done. America is the only country where the victim can say she wasn’t a victim but still a person will go to prison. It is crazy.

    Winslow is crazy. He was high. He probably should have waited until he got home. But at the end of the day, if I was this woman I would have just ignored it and gone about my business instead of calling the cops. Cops never make anything better.

    I also have to question the woman who made the report. So let me get this straight — basically a 60 year old woman, goes over to his car, gets into a conversation, and notices him masturbating? When I was 30, the last thing I would do was strike up a conversation with a 60 year old woman in a parking lot. Escalades are actually kind of big too. You can’t really see in them. Then she never signed her official police report.

    I guess it could be true. Weirder things have happened. I just find it all so funny.

    • @Wow

      That is too funny! You are right though. America is kind of bipolar. Surveys reveal that pretty much 92% of people masturbate daily — if not multiple times a day. These are surveys from reputable people such as Master’s and Johnson. Yet, in public people deny it. I too disagree with the underage sex laws in America. There are a lot of people suffering in prison for consensual sex. I am female. I know when I was underage, I had sex with an older guy. It wasn’t rape or anything. I did it because I wanted to. I was never harmed. I am now married with two kids. Been married for actually 20 years. I have a pretty good life. I will also say this. Girls in 2014 did not look like the girls I went to school with in the 1980s. I feel sorry for guys because unless a girl shows you or tells you her age. You can’t tell.

      • Sweetest Pleasure

        Oh yeah you can tell how old they are, the younger ones taste so much better, like honeydew dipped in pineapple juice. The hair is also more like corn-silk without any kinks.

    • http://www.musicrevolt.org Ned

      Well I don’t agree that cops never make ANYTHING better but yeah this is really stupid. I mean you have to look REALLY HARD and get REALLY CLOSE to see if someone is jacking it in his car. I think she wanted to get a peek, got excited, felt guilty and then decided to CALL THE COPS. Its dumb.

    • @Wow

      Yeah I gotta agree too. It is very weird. I own an Escalade. It is hard to see in my car. I guess he could have a different one than me though, but still it would be difficult. But like you said. Stranger things could happen.

      As for the synthetic pot. Yeah, I can totally believe that part. The masturbating. I am not sure about.