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The Super Bowl, Randy Travis, and Fabric Softener

Today's Funniest Tweets

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The Super Bowl, Randy Travis, and Fabric Softener
[ Social Media]

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Enjoy!

Randy Travis arrested for public intoxication in Dallas this morning. Or as country fans call it, Monday. 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Randy Travis arrested for public intoxication, drove his car into three wooden crosses on the right side of the highway. 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

That was Clint Eastwood? I still thought it was Madonna. 20 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Clint Eastwood never realized that the actual Halftime in America involved male dancers in loincloths lipsynching ‘Vogue.’ 6 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

If Sarah McLachlan and Clint Eastwood teamed up to make a commercial, one single viewing could bum out a country as big as Yugoslavia. 16 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Love the day after the Super Bowl. Just found a Pizza Roll in my beard. 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

How long do we think Tom Brady will be upset about the loss after he remembers he gets to put it in Gisele Bundchen? 16 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry® ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I’m really saddened by the news about Syria and Iran today. I really thought Madonna’s ‘World Peace’ sign at halftime would work 4 hours ago via Echofon ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

M.I.A. gives the finger at the Super Bowl. ooooooh. she’s SO defiant. 13 year olds the world over snickered. 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

M.I.A. should just say she was flipping the bird at those GoDaddy ads and everybody would be completely off her case. 5 hours ago via TweetDeck ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Wes Welker shaved before the postgame press conference. I guess he couldn’t handle both the drop and that mustache. 4 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Wes Welker and his mustache are leaving football to go play for the 1970s Pittsburgh Pirates. 5 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Now that football is over I can return to ignoring my wife and kids for no good reason. 18 minutes ago via Twitterrific ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Just found out Snoop Dogg isn’t even a real detective. 44 minutes ago via Favstar.FM ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I’m so hungover right now I need to make an “It Gets Better” video for my asshole. 51 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I forgot to put a fabric softener sheet in the dryer, now my clothes aren’t as soft. #firstworldproblems 4 hours ago via twitterfeed ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

The Super Bowl, Randy Travis, and Fabric Softener
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