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Kim Kardashian, Halloween 3, and Tim Tebow

Today's Funniest Tweets

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Kim Kardashian, Halloween 3, and Tim Tebow
[ Social Media]

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to kick off Halloween than with a spooktacular filled “Today’s Funniest Tweets”.

Today, Halloween is on everyone’s mind. Not only that, but we get numerous tweets from today’s biggest news, the upcoming divorce of Kim Kardashian and Humphries.

Herman Cains the GOP presidential leader, the McRib is back, and now Kim Kardashians single? Its a good week to be black 36 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

Tonight I’m wearing a Tim Tebow jersey so I can throw candy 15 feet above kids heads. Oh, the hilarity. 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

#ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage Ashanti sideburns… 32 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

RIP James and Lily Potter is trending. Well, this is awkward… 27 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Kim Kardashian earned $18 million from her wedding. I hope she’ll be ok 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Halloween 3 #lessscaryremakes 29 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Romo to begin receiving pain injections for injuries sustained from being hit with the knowledge that John Beck outperformed him this week. 1 hour ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

A black man’s lifespan in a horror movie. #ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage 34 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Accidentally left my phone in the car. Now I have nothing to do while I wait for my Starbucks. #firstworldproblems 55 minutes ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto

The NBA lockout :( #ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage 34 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

A season of Playboy Club on NBC. #ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Nothing makes the idiocy of humans shine quite like a traffic light without power. 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

Scariest Halloween Costume: Guy with face paint over his mustache & beard. 1 hour ago via Favstar.FM · powered by @socialditto

How the fuck was Screech friends with the most popular kid, the captain of the football team, and the hottest chicks in school? 2 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

Tonight I’m dressing as the Mailer Daemon. 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

If you don’t murder someone today with a hatchet, knife, or other sharpe item you are celebrating Halloween wrong. 3 hours ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

I would rather touch a dog’s anus than reach inside a woman’s purse. 37 minutes ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto

Kim Kardashian, Halloween 3, and Tim Tebow


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