If Texas Secedes, Austin Wants No Part in It [Secession Drama]

    November 14, 2012
    Josh Wolford
    Comments are off for this post.

Austin, Texas residents famously want to “keep Austin weird.” It looks like many of them also want to keep Austin a part of the United States.

I’m sure you’ve been following the saga that is the secessionist agenda playing out on the White House’s online “We the People” petition site. Starting one day after President Barack Obama was reelected to a second term, petitions began to appear on the site asking if specific states could “peacefully” leave the union to form their own governments. At first, it was only a couple states being represented – Texas and Louisiana. But it quickly grew to over 50 petitions representing nearly every state in the country.

In response, we saw new petitions created that sought to punish the secessionists and other that simply wanted to unify the country.

Now, in another hilarious wrinkle, the city of Austin, Texas has decided that they don’t want to go along with the rest of Texas (Texas’ secession petition is the most-popular on the site, with nearly 100,000 signatures). Some residents of Austin are formally requesting that they be allowed to “withdraw from the state of Texas & remain part of the United States.”

Here’s their reasoning:

Austin Texas continues to suffer difficulties stemming from the lack of civil, religious, and political freedoms imposed upon the city by less liberally minded Texans. It is entirely feasible for Austin to operate as its own state, within the United States, in the event that Texas is successful in the current bid to secede. It is important for Austin to remain in the union as to do so would protect it’s citizens’ standard of living and re-secure their rights and liberties in accordance with the original ideas and beliefs of our founding fathers.

Like I’ve said before, these secessions petitions, anti-secession petitions, and modified secession petitions are simply serving to discredit the White House petition site, if it had any to begin with. Sure, there are some serious requests that at least deserve a response. But alongside the now 50+ secession-related petitions we have “Make the President attend a Fark.com party…if shceduling does not permit, at least have a beer with Drew Curtis” and “legalize crystal fucking weed.”

As of right now, a half-dozen or so of the secession petitions have hit the threshold (25,000 signatures in 30 days) and now demand an official White House response. That includes the secession requests for Texas (95,000), Georgia (27,000), Tennessee (25,000), North Carolina (25,000), Florida (28,000), and Alabama (26,000). I wonder if the White House will just tackle them all with one response or if they’ll just raise the signature threshold. Who knows? All I do know is that this has slowly but surely devolved into a sideshow.

I think we need a petition to get rid of this petition site and start over, what do you say?

  • lejos del usa 6

    If Texas start a nation–will it reced into Mexico?? or will it be a new nation — naybe this new nation desire to reject colonialsm that try to make nations like Venezuela obey the USA–for exampple– the USA goes into Uganda NIgeria etc & try to make them accept USA type homosexuals “weddings” this is a blatant colonialsm that needs to stop–will Texas ban such a sinful connduct?? IN Venzuela–Russia–Ukraine–Ghana–Jamaica–NIgeria–Japan–Kenya –Hungary–etc– men “marrying” men is banned as a sinful disgrace–but USA try to impose this–will Texas the new nation adhere to the colonialsisms of USA or strike a power for Gods LAws?? this is an interesting international news item–Presidente Chavez has often called for rejections of imperialisms of the old colonialts–maybe this is a new movement to oppose such imperial types of Washington DC–just observe the Jobbik of Hungary– these seem to be the movements of the future–who knows where they will lead– but it can be a future to observe with curiosity

  • John

    If you think that America should remain united as one, sign this petition today! Make a statement that we are Americans and to withdraw from the union is not what we want. https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/keep-united-states-united/ZfpkwtSZ

  • Heather

    Austin is part of Texas. If some of the residents decided that in the event of Texas leaving the Union that they rather stay Americans then let them. They would need to move back to America at that point. Your not taking any part of our beautiful state with you. Texas will always be Texas even if it isn’t part of America. If it bothers you then you need to move.

    • Calvin

      Heather, you are a moron. That is all.

      • Ruiner

        How intelligent Calvin. Perhaps I should set up an altar for you to worship government and Obama while your rights are stripped away amongst throngs of cheering imbeciles like you. The throngs of clueless Obamaites are the cheering face of freedom dying.

    • everett980

      So you’re saying that Texas should be allowed to take their land with them, instead of move out of the United States, but the residents of Austin should move out of Austin instead of keep their land as a part of America?

  • Jackie White

    The majority of the people are not represented by the few people from these alleged 26 states that want to break away from a civilized and United States of America. Fortunately in the current USA the dissatisfied are FREE to leave the country immediately; and should do so. The country elected Barrack Obama as president on Nov 6, 2012 which concluded all campaigning events to elect the President of the USA. The real issue at hand is, if your employer reduced your hours to keep from providing you health care benefits,then you really aren’t a valued employee; basically you’re just an expendable warm body making their product-that you will turn around and purchase in most cases. Pack that food for thought in your mind while you’re being upset about President Obama being re-elected.

    • killedkline

      I remember a history lesson where 13 colonies left a distant ruler who taxed the shit out of them. What is the issue at hand, jackie?

      “Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it”
      -George Santayana 1906

    • laughingoutloud


    • gl wells

      i did…enjoy whay YOU the SHEEPLE have allowed to happen…

  • Dave

    Do these states realize that, except for Texas, they generally get more in federal funds from the government than they pay in taxes? That means Texas would become the sugar daddy of all these states, unless it establishes itself separately. And guess whose gonna be fighting over Texas? Mexico and the newly-seceded Moocher States.

  • eat me

    With all of the butt pirates and kneegro loving jerks residing in our state capitol deportation to a NY dung hole is in order so you can be with like minded morons!

    • Nicholas

      How ironic. It’s like-minded morons like YOU that every intelligent person despises. Racist, bigoted pieces of shit like you don’t deserve to be called American. Take your uneducated, redneck bullshit and shove it up your ass. Goddamn you morons are an inspiration for birth control.

  • Nicky Retkofsky

    Ok…so for just saying it..if this Texas thing happens (fat chance) who’s money would they use? US currency is for americans in AMERICA. And I guess we can melt down and turn all the state quarters from Texas into a “border fence” so us americans can’t get in….lol..what a joke.

    • Bladen

      Texas was ranked the Best state if they became independent. They will do like the U.S did when they first started. They will raise money by collecting money from their cities. Then they rank up money. I’m from North Carolina and our state also has enough signatures to do the same. I believe this needs to happen because its not our fault that our country is blind. America will vanish because in the revelation chapter of the bible. Our country is not in the revelations! So we will most likely vanish and they why we don’t want to be part of it. So you can’t blame us. You may not see it yet but it’s coming this way. We did it when Abraham was president and we can do it again.

    • Cliff

      Ecuador has no problem using US currency, and they were never part of the US, yet it’s still their national currency.
      Explain that one to yourself.
      We’ll use your currency until we develop our own, independent of the rapidly inflating and soon to be worthless US dollar.
      However, if you want to melt down your quarters and build a fence with it…go for it if you think a fence made of copper could even hold itself up, much less be long enough to span a football field.
      Whatever the case is practically, it’s still a better idea than the stupid BS they’re stamping on quarters now; it’s like they’re running out of ideas for the quarter and grasping for straws.
      Next year they’ll probably have constellations or official state snacks stamped on them.
      Ever thought the fu cking eagle was just fine the way it was before they started stamping your pissant little states on them?

  • Nicky Retkofsky

    Oh yeah! Also, what about the dallas cowboys? Aren’t they “America’s Team”? I’ve been looking for an excuse to stop calling them that….as napoleon dynamite says “Yeeesssss…..”

  • Alesia42

    I think that it’s really silly to try and separate themselves from the most powerful country in the world…..sure there are things that “we all need to work on” this country not unlike others has it’s imperfections……and feeling a little disenchanted because the president of their choice was not elected….so now they want to take their ball and go home….boohoo!….let Texas go!….and when the Drug cartels take it over…and they will…. all though they think they are tough with guns in their holesters….they are no match for people who kill for a living…..so I wouldn’t be surprised if people who have these type of affiliations are making plains to take over Texas and other states that leave the union…they will be sitting ducks…unprotected by the US and it’s laws,treaties, military etc…those states and it’s residents, that want to leave the union will be free for the taking by anyone else in the world…..so go ahead..they’re waiting fo you!!…what idiots!!!

    • nativeamerican

      Whos protecting Texans now,cartels are already operating in the state, Arizona has the highest kidknapping in the U.S. We aren’t being protected by anyone. So you think me, with my guns have no chance, what about you anti gun liberals. What chance do you think you have, don’t come to me asking to borrow or buy a gun.

    • sweetjimmylee

      My dear Alesia, you are seriously deluded if you think the USA is protecting anyone from the Cartels now. The state of Texas, on its own, is doing more to stop border violence that the USA and its Border patrol ever did.

      I’m not a proponent of secession but if you are going to put it down, at least pick an argument with some revelency.

      Oh yes, i gotta ask, you don’t know many Texans do you?? ūüėČ

  • Alesia42

    …why not just pack up the wife and kids and pick a place somewhere else in the world….and go there and live?…..if they are not for the US….then leave…they have no rights to the soil that they stand on if they feel that way…..I feel that the mere fact that they are signing that type of petition…means that they obviously don’t want to be apart of the USA…so maybe they should loose their individual citizenships, property etc……why not?

    • killedkline

      Lets throw a big can of propane on the fire, and strip people of their civil liberties more immediately. Have you even glanced at the NDAA, patriot act(s), and Medicare bills or is that racist too?

  • Ram

    What I find interesting but not surprising about these Texas people who want to secede is that somehow their wishes are more important than the rest of the Texas residents who recognize that the majority still rules. If you are not happy with the election results stop acting like sore losers and make a change starting with “the man in the mirror”. Heather that goes for you especially. I am always amazed at the lack of logic some people are capable of.

    You people who want to secede need tto vacate the premises RIGHT NOW ! I suggest you go to a foreign country where elections don’t count and where the majority does not rule. Or you can just go to any one of the states where you will feel more comfortable. Like one of those states where people like to define a “legimate” rape or where you have to get permission from your state government to take the birth control pill. Bye bye and good riddance.

    • killedkline

      I think who ever dosn’t believe in there civil liberties need to leave. I’m sure Cnina would be more than happy to accept your organs. Maybe a good profit in it for them when obama care kicks off in March.

      • sweetjimmylee

        Ram, you can’t possible think that the petition signers actually believe that their petition will generate secession action by the federal government.

        Lighten up would ya!

        By the way, its not time yet, but with the headlong rush to socialism led by the Pied Piper Obama, the day is coming when secession talk will turn serious.

        When the time comes, I’m ready to go. And I won’t have the slightest sense that I’m leaving my country. My Country LEFT ME on the evening of November 6, 2012.

    • gl wells

      and YOUR vote counts? OK…W H A T E V E R

  • laughingoutloud

    Lets have at er clash of the titans here we go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Rusty

    As a resident of Texas if this happens I’m packing my bags and moving away. I love the USA and proud to be an American.

  • Jon

    @lejos del usa 6
    I’m sorry to say this but you seem to fail at understanding the fact that government and religion should never be one in the same because at that point you are telling everyone in your government that you must be this religion or get out. The US is based on the freedom to choose and so applies to your views on such things like homosexuality and where the US is going wrong is by telling other countries to support it as well but I personally feel countries that ban or outlaw just being gay should have their leaders killed with fire.

    On a lighter note, this was pointed out by a young lady that lives in Scotland on the topic of being Scottish not British because she lives in Scotland not Britain. There are two Americas the north and the south, all persons living in North America and South America regardless of the nation they live in so that means we are all Americans not just the people from the U.S. To which case everyone should be calling this nation the United States because if Texas does Secede from the union that there would be one state not united and it would be a false title assuming there aren’t already one or more states in the America’s not belonging to the U.S. Yes its a argument people would say I’m wrong in because everything says the USA or United States of America but considering how out dated a lot of what we use in the US is, why should the name be an exception?

  • Mariano Mendez

    When is raining down in Texas….la…..la…..la

  • Mariano Mendez

    Ok, Texas, You want to go? Fine go. But, remember, If a drought comes, you are not coming back.

  • D2

    Puzzling that Austin would oppose secession. I always thought that Austinites were the non-conformists. Guess those tatoos and nose rings are just for show.

    • Joe

      Austin is the sole bastion of liberalism in all of Texas. The libs who run the city know they’ll be ousted from power if Texas secedes and they don’t have federal troops to back them up.

  • Odira

    YEY Let Texas iscolate themselves from USA and World War 3 can start up I as always will not enlist though I have much important things to manage like my career

  • Americo Vespuchi

    ADIOS…TEXICANOS. SORRY AUSTIN. Shouldn’t have to beg you proud Texas folk to be American. You’re not worth it!

  • tom

    No cental Soviet or Chinese type government for me please, I like to bitch and complain too much.free speech and all rights would be outlawed unless approved by the central commitee.do you in the gay arena think such a government would condone you and your life style?you probably would go in for “re education” or simply disappear. the rest of us would just be slaves of the State.Old farts like me might become too much of a liability to take care of and might be put down like any other sick animal.So I say LONG LIVE TEXAS and her keep her free!If this makes anyone mad, oh well.

  • Rwolf

    Will Obama use NDAA To Arrest State Representatives and Citizens that support Secession?

    Could Obama use NDAA To Arrest Secessionists on the Premise members are Militants and Belligerents that pose a threat to National Security?

    Recently the Obama administration stated to Federal Judge Katherine Forest that under (NDAA) The National Defense Authorization Act of 2012 the President had authorization to lock up belligerents indefinitely. That they (were justified) to lock belligerents up indefinitely‚ÄĒbecause cases involving belligerents directly-aligned with militants against the good of America‚ÄĒwarrants such punishment.) Pres. Obama could use NDAA provisions to order U.S. Military Forces to round up without evidence, millions of Americans including Secessionists and Militias by alleging they are belligerents or a threat to National Security. Many observers believe Obama intends to extend NDAA to imprison U.S. Citizens in Indefinite Detention not involved with or associated with enemy forces.

    Hitler included similar provisions in his fascist (Discriminatory Decrees signed February 28, 1933). Almost immediately after the German Parliament passed Hitler’s laws, the Reich Government ordered the arrest of German Citizens and confiscated their guns without probable cause or evidence; delegated powers to German Police and other authorities to arrest anyone Nazi authorities claimed attempted or incited public unrest: arrested among others were outspoken Germans, writers, journalists, peaceful protestors and artists. After World War II the East German Secret Police (Stasi) used the threat of Indefinite Detention to forcibly recruit thousands of informants.

    The U.S. 2012 NDAA legislation Obama signed 12-31-11 is similar to Hitler’s 1933 fascist laws the SS and Gestapo used to target persons in Germany for arrest, imprisonment and execution without probable cause; and confiscate millions of dollars of property. Hitler used his laws to suspend Parliament and the Supreme Court insuring his laws could not be rescinded.

    During the Obama Administration’s recent request for a (stay) to stop U.S. District Judge Katherine Forrest blocking enforcement of vague NDAA provisions, the Obama Administration‚ÄĒnever clarified what constitutes a (belligerent); or militant; or what belligerent activities (directly aligned with a militant) to order a belligerent‚Äôs arrest or indefinite detention; or what is against the good of America. Under vague provisions of NDAA, the President could accuse anyone of being (directly aligned with militants by way of any political or other association; activity, statement, writing or communication with an individual or group government deemed (militant) to arrest and indefinitely detain Americans. Writers, journalists, Americans that disagree with or question U.S. Government or its allies‚ÄĒmay under NDAA be subject to arrest and indefinite detention.

    NDAA 2012, like Hitler’s 1933 Discriminatory Decrees enforces censorship; refers to the Patriot Act e.g. warrant-less searches of private property and forfeiture of property from persons not charged with crime. Provisions in NDAA 2012 keep the door open for corrupt U.S. police; government agents and provocateurs which there are many, to falsify reports and statements to target any American, group or organization for arrest, indefinite detention, complete disappearance; civil asset forfeiture of their property.

    You may have noted NDAA referred to the USA Patriot Act. The Patriot Act lends itself to Government / police corruption; the Federal Government may use secret witnesses and informants to cause arrests and civil asset forfeiture of Americans’ property. Witness(s) and informants may be paid up to 50% of assets forfeited. Federal Government under 18USC may use a mere preponderance of civil evidence, little more than hearsay to Civilly Forfeit Private Property. Under the Patriot Act innocent property owners may be barred by government knowing the evidence federal government uses to forfeit their property.

    Sections of NDAA 2012 are so broad, it appears U.S. Government or the President could (retroactively) deem an American‚Äôs past 1st Amendment activities prior to passage of 2012 NDAA‚ÄĒsupported hostilities, terrorism or (Belligerents) to order the arrest and Indefinite Detention of any U.S. Citizen, writer, group or organization.

    Under NDAA 2012 it should be expected that indefinitely detained U.S. Citizens not involved in terrorism or hostile activities, not given Miranda Warnings when interrogated, not allowed legal counsel or habeas corpus may be prosecuted for non-terrorist (ordinary crimes) because of their (alleged admissions) while held in Indefinite Detention.

    • Shawn Houck

      Excellent explanation rwolf!

  • gl wells

    there is NO SUCH THING as democracy as most of you think of it… THEY impose law as they see fit…even if you do not like it…if you do not like something they will ‚Äú ram it down their throats‚ÄĚ an example, a PRIME example is the pay rate of ALL elected officials. HOW many of you have seen the email and Facebook post DEMANDING term limits and pay cap and even equal insurance for “special ones” Think THEY CARE? If you do, you are dumber than dirt.. sheeple, you are called that for a reason ‚Ķ bahh bahh bahh‚Ķ so go ahead, read on the internet, chat about it, watch the CONTROLLED news on TV and THEY will, for sure, take every liberty away .. EVERY SINGLE ONE….

  • Evan Wilson

    When North Carolina seceded from the Union in 1861, Ocracoke Island on the Outer Banks voted to secede from North Carolina and sent two Senators and a Representative to Washington to represent the islanders; Congress refused to seat them. Ocracoke remains to this day a cantankerous sort of place. Ocracokers sold diesel fuel to German submariners operating off the coast in WW2, but they also collected and buried British merchant seamen who washed up on Ocracoke from torpedoed ships offshore. After the War, Ocracokers gave their little cemetery to the Crown but continue to lovingly tend it to this day. The only access to the island is still by state-owned ferry. Ocracokers also still speak the most beautiful lilting lyrical singsong English heard anywhere on Earth.

  • Rational Reader

    OK, Texas has the resources, money and attitude to secede. But what Texas really has is a great big heart. I am not a native, came from the Midwest…which I truly believed was the friendliest part of OUR COUNTRY, ONE NATION, UNDER GOD. To my surprise and at first bewilderment, when I first got here, and people would make “casual” eye contact & and ask “how are you”…they paused, waiting for you to answer! YEP, happens every day! So can Texas secede..after the lawyers take the money, probably. Will it happen? No. We are a proud state, overly enthusiastic, I will give you that. At the core, Texans, as I am sure deep down, most citizens of the Republic of the United States of America, are kind, god fearing, help our neighbor people. We have let the media and out of control spending to “get elected” cloud our vision and dampen our hearts. It is time to go back to the foundations of our people. Did we do everything right? No, and we never will, but I test you to ask yourself as you choose which state you live in, which newspaper you read, which small business you support, which athletic event you follow, which charity you choose to support, whether you choose to attend church & pray, or not,….YOU do have a choice. That is something, too many people in this world do not have. When mass tragedies occur, what is our first instinct? We automatically, choose to help thy neighbor as thy self. THAT IS WHY WE ARE THE GREATEST, STRONGEST NATION IN THE WORLD. So please, for your children, or your neighbors, stop the HATE, the VILE, and remember what makes us SO strong and bound SO tight as a nation, is the freedom to have our individual opinions and beliefs expressed, without repercussion. I challenge every citizen, rich or poor, whatever your color, your faith, your politics, to step outside look to your neighbor on each side, look to the beautiful sunrise/sunset and remember those that have fought and died and lived to insure our freedom, our dignity, our faith, our pleasure…and pay it forward, how ever you can, your gift will not be judged by its volume, but by it’s integrity. GOD BLESS AMERICA,THE LAND OF THE FREE AND THE HOME OF THE BRAVE.

  • Mitch

    Texas, don’t the door hit ya in the ass on the way out!