Vanessa Lachey is set to give birth to her second child with husband Nick Lachey soon, but she said recently that there are things she’s learned along the path of motherhood that she wished she’d known when she was pregnant the first time.

Lachey says that while she was carrying son Camden, she had a hard time finding that “bond” that a lot of moms talk about.

“I felt guilty because everyone told me about this love I’d feel, and I wasn’t there yet. I remember asking Nick, ‘Is something wrong with me? I’ve wanted this my whole life, and I’m forcing myself to have those feelings.’ For me, the love really flowed when I found out the baby was a boy. That’s when I could finally bond, once I knew ‘it’ was a him,” she told American Baby.

The couple will welcome a baby girl just after the holidays, which Nick says is exciting but hectic.

“I’m very excited to be a dad again. My dream in life has always been to have a family. It’s surreal when it starts to happen before your eyes.” As for the preparations, he says they still have a few things to finalize.

“It’s all those logistical things — the nursery, the hospital stuff,” he said.

One of the best things about the second child, as many moms will agree, is that the worrying slows down quite a bit.

“Worrying is a waste of time. Once Camden was born, certain fears calmed down. I no longer thought, ‘Will I be able to do this?’ My instincts really did kick in. We stumble and make mistakes, too, but that’s what learning is. That’s the beauty of it,” Vanessa said.