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Rick Santorum, Zebras, and Gluten Allergies

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
Rick Santorum, Zebras, and Gluten Allergies
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Enjoy!

    When am I supposed to stop looking for Easter eggs(image) 13 minutes ago via Twitter for Android ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    It’s Rick Santorum’s choice to terminate his presidential campaign, even this late into its development.(image) 41 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Happy National Siblings Day! I’m gonna go punch my brother in the nuts!(image) 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Obama: US Will Respond to North Korea ‘With Strongest Possible Adjectives’(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    “If five hipsters tweet that they’re deleting their Instagram accounts, does it actually make a noise?”(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPad ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Lamar Odom cut from the Mavs. If you’re an NBA player, marrying a Kardashian is like marrying a torn ACL.(image) 1 day ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Zebras are just living, breathing barcodes.(image) 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Mets haven’t lost since Tebow trade. Guy is amazing.(image) 18 hours ago via Echofon ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    Rick Santorum can now go back to being the Walmart greeter people avoid making eye contact with.(image) 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    The fact I have to watch a commercial before I’m able to see a video clip of Miley Cyrus’ anorexic frame is what’s wrong with the internet.(image) 1 hour ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    I really don’t want to read “Santorum, pulling out” again.(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    The mountain lion was much less terrifying when the Asian guy called it a “mountain ryan.”(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

    the leading cause of gluten allergies is reading an article about gluten allergies.(image) 3 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

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