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Zooey Deschanel, Tatooine Sex Slang, and Halloween Candy

Today's Funniest Tweets

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Zooey Deschanel, Tatooine Sex Slang, and Halloween Candy
[ Social Media]

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Today, we look at tweets from two of the day’s persistent hashtags, #tatooinesexslang and #6wordstories. We also see the adverse effect of eating that leftover Halloween candy and look at some Philosophical Football.

Enjoy!

The Tuskan Raider, where after you’re done, you grab the lamp, hoist it above your head and yell at the top of your lungs. #tatooinesexslang 28 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

I broke the light in my refrigerator so it wouldn’t blind me when I nightfeed. 7 hours ago via Twitter for Android · powered by @socialditto

Crumbling Doritos on a salad is something normal people do, right? 7 minutes ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

#6wordstories: This was more entertaining than Twilight. 8 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

The Third Moon of Yavin is where I stick my Y-Wing. #tatooinesexslang 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

I’ve eaten so much leftover Halloween chocolate in the past few days that I’ve confused my body into having PMS. 7 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

We don’t know that eggnog isn’t Santa Claus jizz. 2 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto

M&Ms melt in your mouth AND in your hands. #firstworldproblems 1 hour ago via twitterfeed · powered by @socialditto

The only thing worse than getting AIDS is regifting it. 4 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Bantha Fodder; Hooking up with the ugly girl so your friend can get some action #Tatooinesexslang 30 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

#PhilosophicalFootball If Tim Tebow throws a pass in the forest, and nobody is around to see it, is it still ugly? 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Why is anyone surprised by these Herman Cain harassment allegations? The bucka-bucka wow-wow always starts when the pizza guy arrives. 3 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

#6wordstories: Named my pipe “Lucky.” It broke. 2 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Guess who’s got a baby bump??? My grandson who I accidentally dropped on his head!!! 6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

Zooey Deschanel & husband Ben Gibbard split. Maybe he couldn’t take her singing in those annoying cotton commercials 6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

“Letting the Wookie win” — getting cock-blocked by a pretty girl’s ugly friend at the bar. #tatooinesexslang 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

Zooey Deschanel, Tatooine Sex Slang, and Halloween Candy
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  • Koichi Ito

    Tatooine is a planet that might be orbiting around Capella(Alpha Aurigae)? And Zooey Deschanel might be another Angelina Jolie, Brooke Shields, Milla Jovovich, or Megan Fox?

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