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You Probably Shouldn’t Masturbate In A School Hallway If You Want To Remain A Teacher

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It must be hard being a teacher. It must be even harder when you’re a substitute teacher – an unfamiliar face in a hostile environment. Despite all that, they put on a brave face and keep the class in order while the regular teacher is out. For that, we give them our thanks. Our thanks doesn’t give them free reign to relieve themselves in a school hallway though.

The Courant reports that Michael Luecke, a 72-year-old substitute teacher at Westhill High School was arrested Wednesday for masturbating in public. He wasn’t bashing the bishop in any ol’ public setting though – it was a high school hallway.

According to the police report, Luecke was caught “suspiciously manipulating the front of his pants while looking at students in the courtyard.” He then moved to the floor where he continued “manipulating his penis” until a school paraprofessional stumbled upon him thinking he was hurt. She quickly realized the sight of geriatric masturbation would scar children for life and notified police and school officials.

What makes this story even more interesting weird is that the paraprofessional didn’t stop Luecke or detain him. He went on to teach the class he was subbing for until police entered the classroom and arrested him.

While police arrested Luecke before he could masturbate in any more hallways, surveillance footage shows that six children walked by the teacher as he was playing pocket pool. The school is now trying to identify those six students to see if they need counseling. What’s likely to happen, however, is that none of them even noticed and the school will fracture their innocence by notifying them that they walked past an old man enjoying the view.

As for Luecke, he was charged with public indecency, breach of peace and risk of injury to minor. He has no prior criminal convictions so he’ll probably get off easy.

Image via Stamford Police Department

You Probably Shouldn’t Masturbate In A School Hallway If You Want To Remain A Teacher
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