McBrain vs. Zombama
Upon a seller tagging his or her Barack Obama mask in such a way to make it appear for the term “terrorist costume,” Amazon has made the proper adjustments. While that’s a fascinating event, there’s still a lot of guilt-by-association fun to be had by examining Amazon’s “Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought…” feature.
Also apparently missing from Amazon is whatever came up for “Sexy MC Cain Perfect Trophy Wife Halloween Costume,” the landing page for it now 86’d and 404’d.
Regardless of those missing items, customers who bought and customers who viewed campaign-related merchandise have some interesting corresponding interests. Maybe what you buy does say a lot about you after all.
In the spirit of Halloween, which is Friday, we’ve focused a lot on costumes. Our vote: either the McCain McBrain zombie mask or the Zombama one will do. As for the comparison, we’ll begin with the incumbent GOP nominees.
In This Corner, the Republicans
Customers who bought a John McCain mask also bought a copy of Charlie Wilson’s War, a g-darn flag pin, and bulk toilet paper.
You’d think the folks buying McCain action figures might have some exciting associated purchases. Not so, unless you consider the Tiger Woods PGA Tour 08 DVD, shower heads, coffee presses, and strollers all that titillating. Dang conservatives. Sometimes you need new blood to shake things up. Which brings us to…
Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin will no doubt be a popular character to caricature this Friday, and sure enough, the Sarah Palin glasses and Miss Alaska sash are at the top of the search results for [Sarah Palin costume]. Customers who viewed this option also viewed these nifty moose antlers.
But one of the reasons Halloween is going to rock this year is the obligatory lady who shows up to the party sporting the Sexy Sarah Palin Costume, consisting of glasses, a sash, a star-spangled bikini, high heels and rifle with scope. Customers who viewed this costume also viewed the button-front linen blazer (hey, it’s chilly in October), the grizzly rifle, and the sexy pirate, who’s welcome at anyone’s parrrrrrrrty.
If one really wanted to shake things up, they could go with this “John McCain is my homeboy” t-shirt, so long as they don’t mind being associated with people wearing the “This is what gun control looks like” or the “I’m voting for Sarah Palin and that white-haired dude” shirts.
Various life-size cutouts are available of candidates on both sides of the ticket, current or former. Those viewing Palin’s standup poster also took a gander at the VPILF t-shirt and the Sarah Palin Hockey Mom Hockey Puck.
The Democrat Challengers
Want to dress up as Joe Biden? The lack of options in that race is astonishing. What? No foot-in-mouth masks? No Biden Teaches History: the FDR on TV Edition spoofs? Unfortunately, all Joe really brought back was a suggestion the searcher scratch the Biden part and add Dirt. Then you get this killer Joe Dirt (totally Joe Six Pack) mullet wig.
They can wear that with their Barack Obama for President belt buckle.
People who checked out the Barack Obama mask were likely in line for the original iPhone as well. They also viewed the new iPod Nano, the iPod Touch, both Sony Playstation 3 and Xbox 360 Elite and various new Wii controllers–and don’t forget the Batman outfit. These may be the same ones who when they bought an Obama action figure, stocked up on Star Wars Clone Trooper Voice Changer Helmets and the Dark Knight Joker bobblehead.
It’s understandable (and a little creepy) that anyone invested enough to purchase a life-sized stand up poster of Obama might also be interested in Obama underwear. Because you’re too old for Superman ones. But not for Darth Vader on the other side of the bedroom asking him to come to the Dark Side.
Those nostalgic for the days of Ronald Reagan, can snag a standup cutout of the Gipper as well. Customers who viewed the life-sized Reagan poster, sort of predictably also viewed the “Screw Democrats” t-shirt.
For those still clinging to a Ron Paul campaign, his mask is still available, and so is the “I Can Has Cheezburger? A LOLCAT Colleckshun” book all of his other supporters appear to be enthralled by. Ron Paul Hot Sauce is also available for Bloody Mary topping while studying all those economics and constitution books his fans seem to be fond of.
Those who carefully considered purchasing a Mitt Romney mask, also thoughtfully perused the political philosophy area, John Stuart Mill’s Utilitarianism, Jean Jacque Rousseau’s The Social Contract, and Spider-Man: Web of Shadows weighing heavily on their minds.
Hey look, you can still get the Hillary Clinton nutcracker—and way discounted too. If you’d buy that, then Amazon thinks you also might be interested in a countdown-till-Bush-is-gone desk calendar, a copy of the definitive guide to white trash etiquette, and your very own Corkscrew Bill.
Those who bought a Corkscrew Bill, by the way, also bought new towels, an electric wine opener, the Popup Book of Sex, and 5-hour Energy Drink by the case. Sounds like somebody’s expecting one hell of a night.