So, I'm sure you heard the news about Baffman.* If you haven't, you've probably been off of Facebook, Twitter, reddit, and basically the rest of the internet for the last 24 hours. That's fine. I'm sure you had important things to do.
If you're unaware, Ben Affleck is your new Batman. He's set to star as the dark knight in director Zack Snyder's Batman/Superman film slated for released in the summer of 2015.
Ok, so there's a sector of the internet that's none too thrilled about this. Mainly the guy who thought he should petition the White House to ban anyone from letting Affleck play a superhero for the next 200 years. 200 years, because he had to be thorough you know, with technology and such.
"I am asking you Mr. President, to make it illegal for Benjamin Geza Affleck-Boldt (otherwise known as Ben Affleck, or that guy that ruined Dare Devil) to act in or be part in, any movie related to super heroes. Ben Affleck should not protray Batman or any other super hero on film or the SyFy network. We are concerned Americans, who care about our fictional heroes, often more than ones that actually existed," says our petitioner.
He goes on: "I am sure Mr. Affleck is a nice enough guy, but he has a history of ruining films that he doesn't star, direct, produce, and cater all by himself."
Unfortunately (or fortunately?) the White House admins removed the petition because it doesn't fall within the scope of We The People - which means that it's clearly not a governmental matter. Ok, fine.
But over on change.org, it's a different story. There are a handful of active petitions demanding that Warner Brothers remove Affleck as the choice for the next caped crusader - the largest of which has about 14,000 signatures so far.
"His acting skill is not even close to being believable as Bruce Wayne and he won't do the role justice. He's not built, nor is he intimidating enough for the role of Batman. His portrayal of Daredevil was atrocious and he's not remotely close to an action star. Please find someone else," says John Roden of Ludlow, KY.
He backtracks a little on the vitriol, saying that "this petition was not meant in any way to harm Ben Affleck or his career. I respect Affleck's work, I just feel he is inappropriate for the role."
Too late John. That was hurtful.
C'mon guys. We love Affleck. Just give him a chance. That's all he's asking for - a chance. I mean, if Michael Keaton can play Batman, we can at least give Affleck a chance. I'm fine with whatever as long as they don't give Baffman the Clooney-batman's nipple suit. Plus, I think it's time for a bearded Batman. Did you see that sweet shit Affleck was rocking in Argo?
The only, ONLY, reason to be upset about this pick is that there was an actual clear choice for who should play batman...
Wow. Really upset about the whole "Ben Affleck as Batman" thing. I was really rooting for Nicolas Cage.
— Megan D (@megantwentytwo) August 23, 2013
*Use of "Baffman" credited to the marvelous Chris Kluwe.[GIF via Tumblr]