Just try to read this without feeling like you’re sitting in the back of the classroom, snickering with your buddies at the slightest hint of double entendre – you know, she said jacket, heh heh.

It’s bad enough this story involves virtual sex and real fake money, but add in that "Stroker" is suing an imaginary nemesis in a real court of law and you’re head might explode.

Okay, so Stroker Serpentine’s (what, Balls McFly  already taken?) nemesis isn’t really imaginary. He’s an avatar until Serpentine (real name Kevin Alderman) figures out who the flesh-and-blood version of Volkov Catteneo is.

Catteneo, according to Serpentine, is a pirate who’s been selling knockoffs of his company’s virtual sex beds. The beds are sold in SecondLife, to SecondLifers with no real FirstLife (that’s a joke, a cheap one, please no hateful comments or emails accusing me of stereotyping virtual perverts, and/or the kind of perverts they are in real life).

Each SexGen bed sells for L$12,000 (US$45.11) – yes, there is a currency rate, and yes, Reuters provided the conversion, presumably with a straight face.

Reuters also provides a link to the PDF of Serpentine’s complaint, spelled out in 79 very real and mind-bending pages.

After Reuters conducted a virtual interview with Catteneo, Wagner James Au of GigaOm chatted with Stroker for more details on the case.