Martin Andrews says he was doing his laundry when he accidentally spilled fabric softener on a shirt. What happened next was a miracle. Sort of.

“I showed my mates at work the picture and one of them said, ‘I’ve heard you can find comfort in Jesus but you’ve found Jesus in Comfort!’” Andrews said.

The shirt was immediately transformed from a regular old piece of fabric to a cloth of divine intervention: Jesus Himself appeared in the fibers, and Andrews took a picture that has swept the web. It’s a bit blotchy, but Andrews and thousands of viewers have said they can definitely make out the shape of Jesus with his arms outstretched in a welcoming gesture.

No word yet on what Andrews plans to do with the shirt.

He hath returned! Praise be to Jesus for sending images of Him in a fabric softener stain (he lost his cell phone). upi.com/blog/2013/04/2…

— Pope Siglericus XXX (@PopeSiglericus) April 22, 2013

and you call me cray ===>> Man claims to have found Jesus’s face after spilling fabric softener goo.gl/3b46j

— Super Cheezy (@web_supergirl) April 22, 2013

You know it’s Monday when: Man Claims Jesus Appears in T-Shirt Fabric Softener Stain (PHOTO) christianpost.com/news/jesus-fab… @renzogracie_bjj

— Lisa Suhay (@NiceChess757) April 22, 2013

A man claims that the fabric softener stain on his T-shirt looks like Jesus. He is now calling the cloth the Snuggle of Turin.

— Bill Kempin (@BillKempin) April 22, 2013

Lisa Kilbourne-Smith and James Davis were watching Tink the hamster as its owners were gone. Everything was apparently all right until they found Tink dead at the bottom of his cage. After the shocking find, they buried the little guy under a foot of dirt.

Then something “miraculous” happened – Tink was discovered the next day alive and well rummaging around some old boxes. As it turns out, Tink was merely hibernating. Hamster hibernation is frequently mistaken for death apparently.

Stil, the family thinks that Tink’s natural resurrection is nothing short of a miracle. The hamster’s reemergence on Good Friday has only added to the wonder with the family reportedly now calling the hamster “Jesus.”

[Arbroath via Gawker]

According to an Associated Press report, the Jackson City School district has agreed to take the picture down amid first amendment concerns.

The picture was hung in Jackson Middle School in 1947. It is owned by the school’s Christian Hi-Y Club, which took the picture down on Wednesday.

The decision to take the picture down came after a student and two parents, with help from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) of Ohio and the Freedom from Religion Foundation, had sued the school district. The lawsuit claimed the picture was unconstitutional, as it promoted a particular set of religious beliefs.

Superintendent Phil Howard told the AP that the decision was based on the high cost that battling the lawsuit would cost. The school board had initially voted to keep the picture up, arguing that removing it would violate the Hi-Y Club students’ free speech rights.

The series is being produced by Mark Burnett and his wife, Roma Downey. Burnett is best-known for network reality TV shows such as Survivor, and Downey found fame in the 90s for playing an Angel in the series Touched by an Angel.

According to The Bible‘s website, the show will depict dramatizations of some of the best-known stories from the bible, including Noah’s ark, the Israelites’ exodus, and the birth of Jesus. The role of adult Jesus in the series will be played by Portuguese actor Diogo Morgado.

Despite being on the History Channel, The Bible will not be an examination of the historicity of the Christian bible. Instead, the series is a docu-drama based on various popular stories from the book. Also, some of the stories depicted have been altered to “create a moving story” within the series’ time constraints.

Rather than historical documentaries and research, the History Channel in recent years has been characterized by its pseudoscientific programming, such as Ancient Aliens, and reality TV shows such as Ax Men and Pawn Stars.

“I helped my pastor make this music video when I was in high school. Thought you guys might get a kick out of it! May the Lord bless and keep you,” says YouTube uploader Brian Spinney.

What follows is…well…is something. JC means a lot of Pastor Jim Colerick and he knows that if he wants to reach the “urban” crowd, he has to speak the language (Warning: NSFW language):

The video has flown to the front page of reddit, where the skeptics have been hard at work figuring out what’s going on here. On January 15th, 2013, two things happened. First, the YouTube account that uploaded this video was created. Second, this page was registered. It’s supposedly the official website of West Dubuque Church of Christ, led by “Pastor Jim.” In the “news” section, we learn that the church was apparently shuttered in June of 2004.

As amazing as it would be if this was simply one youth pastor’s misguided attempt to connect with the kids, we’re just looking at a very well-made comedy video. Emphasis on very well-made.

They have decided to do that through their new website peacewithgod.jesus.net. The web site has been credited with saving over 450K people since its launch. But it doesn’t stop there! “People don’t make decisions and then show up in church the next week,” Director of Internet Evangelism John Cass said. “These same people who are hurting in this world are still walking by churches on every corner.”

When you go to the site you have the option of going into a 4 step program that is loosely based on John 3:16 that says “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” I think they do a pretty good job of portraying their message.

Here are the 4 steps and the videos that accompany them:

Step 1 – God so loved the world

Step 2 – That He gave His only Son

Step 3 – That whoever believes in Him

Step 4 – Should not perish

This is not to say that both Jesus and Diablo don’t have their place. Personally I’m rooting for both of them. It just seems to me that if Christian leaders think that making an even crappier version of Castleville (I didn’t think that was possible) is going to draw gamers away from a release like Diablo 3, they have another thing coming.

After sampling the game, I have to say that it will not help anyone become more interested in the story of Jesus. Adding pointless tasks like chopping wood and tending flowers, does not make His story more compelling. The character art of Jesus and friends also comes off as creepy rather than comforting and inspirational.

Those eyes are a little too sparkly.

Unfortunately, you can’t see it here, but all of the characters stare eerily to you when you play the game. Even worse is your avatar, who never takes his gaze off you as he chops wood, waters flowers, and generally tidies-up around Israel.

This game is a direct rip off of Zynga games, and even asks you to pay real money for collectables and to advance through the game. Hmm, you have to pay to advance and learn the tenets of Christ. This sounds more like a cult than Christianity.

Along your journey you’re given prompts that refer to the Bible, but you are so annoyed with chopping wood and paying for energy that they are meaningless:

“Life is hard in Israel, but people are talking about John the Baptist. Is John the long-awaited Messiah who will save Israel, or is he ‘a voice calling in the wilderness…’?”

“You heard a voice from heaven declaring, “This is My Son!” What could this mean?”

Along the way you meet a gaggle of ne’re-do-wells who are seeking redemption: “I’ve been looking for love with a lot of men, and I still feel empty… I just want to get free of my past…”

“Looks like you need to get right with Jesus; and by that, I mean give us $60 for 760 pieces of fake gold.”

Jesus’ Corporate Sponsorships. Oh really now.

All in all, I think that if you want to learn about Jesus’ teachings you should probably go to church and read the Bible. Then you can practice them by treating people fairly and volunteering in your community. Leave the video games to Satan.

Why is Beelzebub made of Gold?

“You are all stardust. You couldn’t be here if stars hadn’t exploded, because the elements (carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, all the things that matter for evolution) weren’t created at the beginning of time. They were created in stars. So forget Jesus. Stars died so you can live.”

Cyrus also added the word “Beautiful” to her tweet.

A teen pop idol, calling high school yearbook-level existential detritus on her Twitter account that mentions the words forget Jesus “beautiful” is not good sometimes in America. So, some of her followers chimed in, many offering predictable replies that questioned her faith, and whether or not her fame has caused her to backslide. Here are a few more surrounding Cyrus’ new science:

In response to the controversy, Cyrus’ handlers Cyrus posted a quote from Einstein:

Trace Cyrus, half-brother of Miley, posted this on his Twitter, soon after Miley posted the controversial picture in question:

And there you have it.

Woman Sues Apple Over Price Cuts

It’s just too easy and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Dongmei Li*, a woman from Queens, New York, has enlisted C Jean Wang, of Wang Law Offices, to file suit against Apple for $1 million for "price discrimination, underselling, discrimination in rebates, deceptive actions and other wrongdoings."

The suit comes after Apple’s much-fussed-about $200 iPhone price just 68 days after launch. As an early adopter, Li is claiming injury because of the price cut, as early adopters are unable to resell their phones “for the same profit as later purchasers.”

The suit also claims "market conditions did not require Apple to change its price," and that the exclusivity of Apple’s deal with AT&T is unfair.

Apple and AT&T were quick to boast about the sales of iPhone soon after launch, and the public nicknamed it the "Jesus Phone" for the seeming paroxysmal ecstasy that accompanied it since it was unveiled six months before release.

Apple CEO Steve Jobs offered a compromise after the early-adopter uproar by offering a $100 discount toward the purchase of another Apple product. Ms. Li obviously thinks that’s not enough.

As for the "market conditions" argument, Ms. Li’s attorney will have to argue that in court, one would assume, as Apple’s apparent motivation seemed to be the upcoming Christmas season and potentially stiff competition arises during that time period. Whether or not a holiday sales season qualifies as a market condition will be up to whomever decides the case.

^{*According to this website Dongmei means "winter + plum blossom," so stop being an insensitive jerk.} 

I’m only saying that, aside from entries and edits made to more clerical and administrative areas of Wikipedia, "W." leads as the topic of choice among editors and writers there. Jesus isn’t even second; he’s in third place, behind the United States.

Perhaps, "less agreeable" is better than "popular."

According to the stats provided by Wikipedia, over 32,000 edits have been made to articles about George W. Bush by 3,622 users, doubling the number of edits made to entries about the U.S. with 16,594 from 2,320 users.

As for the Prince of Peace, the Wonderful Counselor, God With Us? Seems there’s less to quarrel with. Only 1,747 users have made 15,286 edits to articles about Jesus.

At least he trumps the 2006 Israel-Lebanon conflict (14,287 edits) and his, well, antithesis, Adolf Hitler (14,287), who edges out World War II in general (14,033), RuneScape (13,155), Hurricane Katrina (12,754), and Nintendo Wii (12,465).

Ah, the things humans will argue about.

Those are overall numbers since Wikipedia’s inception. Here are the top 25 most edited articles as of March 2007 (the latest numbers Wikipedia made available):

1.    300 (film)
2.    George W. Bush
3.    Deaths in 2007
4.    PlayStation 3
5.    Wikipedia
6.    Essjay controversy
7.    Harry Potter
8.    Eminem
9.    Battle of Thermopylae
10.    Borat
11.    Conservapedia
12.    United States
13.    American Idol (season 6)
14.    Grand Theft Auto IV
15.    World War II
16.    Saint Patrick’s Day
17.    Beyonce Knowles
18.    WrestleMania 23
19.    McDonald’s
20.    Kobe Bryant
21.    2007
22.    2007 Cricket World Cup
23.    Christianity
24.    Jesus
25.    American Idol