Spice Girls, Orbitz, and Jeffrey Dahmer
Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.
And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.
If Orbitz steers Mac users to pricier hotels, does it steer Linux users to free couch surfing?
The Spice Girls have reunited. Mitt Romney called it “another failure of leadership by Obama.”
John Edwards and Rielle Hunter broke up. Ladies, stay away from online dating profiles like “almostprez1953”.
Jeffrey Dahmer is the only person whose bologna really did have a first name.
Someone should have told Paris Hilton that DJing and BJing are two very different things. Explains why she stroked the mic so much, though.
The dialogue in The Newsroom makes me think it was written on a keyboard with a broken space bar.
Alex Trebek bouncing back after heart scare. Should be up and passive-aggressively correcting people’s pronunciations in no time.
Logged into orbitz with my Linux machine, it suggested I stay in a youth hostel
If you watch Independence Day backwards it’s about a spaceship shitting out Randy Quaid into a life of alcoholism
I’m not sure what I want, what I really really want, but it definitely isn’t a Spice Girls reunion.
I want to read a book on my kindle, but everyone will think I’m reading 50 Shades of Grey #firstworldproblems
Instead of sending an “e-card,” why not swing by & fart in my mouth?