Morgellons Disease Terrorizes Internet & Twitter For A Day

    January 26, 2012

Ever feel like you’ve got tiny insects crawling all over you and biting your skin? Do you get oozing skin lesions as a result, or ever see blue, black, or red granules beneath or extruding from your skin? What about even vaguer terms, like short-term memory loss or depression and feelings of isolation?

If you experience one or more of these, you may have Morgellons disease. And, officially, at this point in this article, every reader has officially self-diagnosed themselves with Morgellons disease.

Except… there’s one catch: you don’t have tiny bugs infesting your skin. In fact, if you feel any of those symptoms, it’s all in your head.

Granted, the sores and depression and fatigue probably do have real causes – it’s just not from Morgellons disease. At least that’s what scientists suspect.

The Internet, as it is wont to do, has been crawling with searches about the disease (two of the top ten search trends this afternoon have been about the disease) given the terrifying premise that such a malady may be psychologically self-generated. Over at the Twitterscape, people opined and panicked and prognosticated about the news of this phantom menace:

The CDC announced that Morgellons is officially delusional parasitosis. What’s next, telling me these placebos don’t work?!?!? 5 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

No, the bugs aren’t crawling all over you. Science says there’s no explanation of Morgellon’s disease | 2 minutes ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

Morgellon’s looking more like an alien disease. 10 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

CDC study: Morgellons disease not caused by mysterious fibers under skin. In other news, crack bugs not caused by bugs. 18 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

@AlisynGayle I know a lot of ppl who say they have Morgellons. Many do sound very mentally challenged. Guess what? Neuro parasite, I bet. 13 minutes ago via web · powered by @socialditto

CDC concludes a new study of Morgellons disease. Believers probably won’t be happy with it. 1 hour ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

You may have Morgellons disease, but you gotta stop gnawing those gnarly cuticles, bro! 2 hours ago via bitly · powered by @socialditto

Yikes. This mysterious “crawling skin” disease has no medical explanation | 42 minutes ago via HootSuite · powered by @socialditto

Morgellons disease is the perfect ailment to strike fear into the heart of Internet users. Good luck out there.