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Is This iPerv Week or What?

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I didn’t torture myself to investigate as to whether there was a season for weird Internet sex stories in the press, but as for 2007, iPerv Week is May 21-25.

Already we’ve read about a Tennessee State Trooper’s porn-movie-plot run-in with Internet smut-queen Barbie Cummings, MySpace’s new sex predator narc program, and also about that sicko in Oregon getting 24 years for impersonating a 15-year-old leukemia patient to get 12-year-olds undressed via webcam.

The nastiness continues. Warning: The following will detail (in part) some rather offensive stuff. There may be jokes cracked, too, just so you know. We’ll do it on a graduated scale – funny to weird to really weird.

The iGasm

Apple’s apparently not too happy about this, but everybody else seems to be. In England, an online merchant is selling the "iGasm," an iPod attachment that, er, well, let’s quote the site:

…hooks up to your iPod, MP3 player, laptop or CD player and vibrates in sync with the beat. Go at it hard and fast with a pounding drum and bass track or chill with the ambient classic. Just turn up the volume to increase the strength of the vibrations and believe us when we say that full whack is PHENOMENAL.

Yeeeow! Is it hot in here? Are you embarrassed? I’m embarrassed – is my face flushed?

According to News of the World, Apple is "iRate" over the use of their signature silhouette look and feel. I wonder how the iTalians feel about it.

Ooh. Sorry about that. By the way, the term "iGasm" was coined in London in 2006, according to Urban Dictionary.

Filed Under ‘Get A Friggin Life’

Or a Second Life. I mean a real second life. The Fuzz over in England, Holland, and Belgium are scratching their heads trying to decide if avatar-on-avatar sex crimes are punishable in the real world. "Online rape" on Second Life could be violations of harassment laws in those countries.

Here’s a virtual "wet willie" to the Euro Po-po. Gonna arrest me for thinking next?

Stop Here If You Want To Keep Your Faith In Humanity

A Maryland Webmaster was convicted for engaging in forced labor and sex trafficking. Glenn Marcus did horrible things to an apparently willing "Jodi" and posted the BSDM footage on his bondage website.

Nothing too deviant, you know, just carving the word "slave" in her stomach and the usual flogging. According to testimony, Jodi moved in with Marcus and lived to "serve Him, to please Him."

I’ll give you second to shake off the heebie-jeebies.

Anyway, Marcus was found guilty of the sex trafficking and forced labor charges and was forced to shut down his Website, SlaveSpace.com. On the site, Marcus called the charges "scurrilous," but the judge has a hard time reading from behind the leather mask.

Really, really sorry about that. 

Is This iPerv Week or What?
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