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Crying about Google ignoring your keyword stuffed web pages just gives Matt Cutts and the rest of the SEO world something to gleefully mock.

Cutts Pokes Fun At Keyword Stuffer

It's a conspiracy, man. The Google hierarchy doesn't want you to know how to become immortal. It's totally true, you can read it on the Internet, you just can't find it through Google, see?

Yeah, we see what you did there, or at least Matt did. Some people will still try old tricks to get noticed by the search engine. Matt highlighted one website whose owner offers the key to immortality (magnetic rings) and one of the more entertaining keyword stuffing examples you'll see today.

"'Internal vaginal aphrodisia doping hardware?' Huh? And what does a 'plasma tv advanced chart' have to do with immortality?" he asked upon reviewing the source of a page from the site. That page had a small textarea at the bottom, and viewing the page source revealed its bizarre contents.

It's one of the oldest games in the questionable tactics book, one that Google prefers webmasters to avoid. Keyword stuffing brings searchers to a page that has no benefit for them.

Such disappointment tends to be vented at the search engine for bringing up a non-relevant page. The typical Internet user has no idea what keyword stuffing is or where to find it on a web page.

If you must indulge in stuffing, stick to the tasty side dish variety. Bread cubes, chicken broth, country sausage, slivered almonds, chopped apple, diced sweet onion, sage, and poultry seasoning will make you a happier person without risking a banning from Google.