Here’s How The 1% Prepares For The Zombie Apocalypse
Sure, everyone says that they are ready for the zombie apocalypse. Hell, I’ve read enough zombie fiction and watched enough movies to know how to best the bastards. It doesn’t matter if they are the slow, dumb kind or the fast, smart kind – I have a strategy for both.
But are you really ready? Think fast – do you already have your tactical fields op waterproof uni-directional bezel watch? How about your assault gear cheat rifle with grenade and magazine pouches? No? You really think your shotgun and case of shells is going to do the trick?
If you’re of the belief that this situation is imminent, you may want to check out OpticsPlanet’s Z.E.R.O Kit – but only if you have some disposable income…like $23,999 worth of it.
Here’s what OpticsPlanet has to say about their kit:
There is no room for error when dealing with the undead. Our Z.E.R.O. (Zombie Extermination, Research and Operations) Kit takes into account all the different aspects of surviving the looming zombie apocalypse. When the undead hordes rise from their shallow graves to wreak havoc on all decent civilization, you’ll need to both fight back (Extermination), and find a cure (Research).
Always be prepared. In the new zombie world you can be king of the hill, or the tastiest treat in town.
And of course, zombies may not be the only thing trying to turn you into a treat. Tough times call for even tougher actions – and the survival kit may have to protect you from Mr. Anderson across the street, who’s hunger has led him to make some interesting decisions concerning the value of a human life.
The most intriguing part of the kit comes from the “R” in “Z.E.R.O”: Research. You can only kill so many zombies before you lose focus and become food or lose the motivation to live and just off yourself. To avoid such fates, one has to work on a cure:
“We’ve included Qorpak Beakers, Labnet Pipettes and a Celestron Microscope so you can take samples and study the innermost workings of zombies. The destructive nature of their cells might lead you to a better understanding of their life expectancy or how to possibly treat their symptoms so they no longer hunger for human flesh,” they say.
Here’s the list of weapon accessories that you get for your $24K:
- GG&G Extreme Heavy Duty Swivel Bipod GGG-1245
- Eotech Gear Scopecoat Cover for EoTech Zombie Stopper Red Dot Sight
- OPMOD PVS-14 Monocular Gen 3 PINNACLE Night Vision Scope 64 lp/mm GNVPVS14-OPMOD
- Thermal Eye X50 100x800px Waterproof Thermal Imaging Camera, NTSC – 1000380-0001
- Surefire 6V LED Shotgun Forend Weaponlight for Benelli M1-M2 617LM
- Leupold VX-R ZOMBIE 1.25-4x20mm 30mm Riflescope ZombieDot Green SPR
- Plano Moulding Zombie Ammo Can
- Champion Zombie Target 6-Pack, Attack
- Streamlight TLR-1 HP Long Range Rail Mounted Flashlight, Standard Switch w/ Rail Locating Keys for Glock Style,1913 Picatinny, S&W 99/TSW & Beretta 90two & Lithium Batteries, Box 69217
- Safariland 6305 ALS Tactical Holster w/ Quick Release Leg Harness – STX TAC Black, Right Hand, Hood Guard Sentry Protection 6305-7742-131-SH
- New, Steiner 10×50 Military Binoculars Laser Rangefinder
- Leupold Mark 4 20-60x80mm, Black Spotting Scope, TMR Reticle 110826
- Laser Devices DBAL-I2 Dual Beam Laser, Visible Green Laser
- Mako Group Fab Defense Handguard w/Rails For Remington Model 870 PR870
- Trijicon ACOG 6×48 Dual Ill Riflescope w/Mount, Green Chevron .308 Reticle
- Vero Vellini Premium Padded Leather Rifle Sling, Brown V17228
- Crimson Trace Full size Glock Laser Zombie Edition
- Eotech Zombie Stopper Red Dot Holographic Sight
And that’s less than half of the kit’s contents. You can check the product page for a complete listing. No actual weapons, however, but that’s cool. Anyone knows the first act of any zombie outbreak is raiding the local gun store.[h/t Geekologie]