Googler Proposes Twice Via Google Street View

    August 5, 2008
    WebProNews Staff

See, here’s how it works if you fall on the naturalist/biochemical side of love rather than the esoteric/spiritual side: The male species of human, as is common across non-asexually reproductive species, often makes grand gestures during the mating ritual in order to win the affection and devotion of the female.

Similar to male birds, he flaunts his brightest colors, does his best dancing, sings his prettiest songs. Similar to his chimpanzee cousin, he squares his shoulders, bares his teeth, and attempts showy displays of physical prowess, which impresses her, no doubt, but also he must exhibit signs of tenderness and the ability to nurture and counsel via ritualistic grooming. It is not necessary he be in actuality the strongest, handsomest, and most sensitive to her needs, only that he do the best job of making himself look that way long enough to gain her attention and, eventually, her commitment. (The female’s approach is much different, but that need not be discussed here.)

Biochemically, two hormones are necessary to ensure both reproduction and that the male human make himself look very stupid in just the right way: testosterone and dopamine (among a triad of others which complicate things much further, oxytocin, serotonin, and Sigmund Freud). Testosterone gives him the courage and motivation to do silly things and dopamine ensures he’s dopey enough to carry through.

This is typiclaly all done prior to a marriage proposal. Afterward, there is no further need to show off.

This process has been repeated throughout the ages and has proven to be, for the most part effective, hence its continued practice. Therefore it is somewhat anomalous (and perhaps malfunctory) why Googler Michael Weiss-Malik, after securing his girlfriend Leslie’s nuptial agreement, overshot his evolutionary programming by insisting on Proposal 2.0.

It was 2.0, you see, because it was the second proposal, following 1.0, to which she accepted. Weiss-Malik, perhaps exhibiting newly formed traits of a subspecies known as "geek," then established a website through Blogger called, where he in his extended bravado would propose a second time via Google Street View.

Proposal 2.0
 Proposal 2.0

When the Google Maps car rounded the Googleplex, Weiss-Malik stood with throngs of others to greet it for a panoramic image. Next to others with their own sign reading, simply, "Hi Mom," Weiss-Malik held up a sign reading "Proposal 2.0: Marry Me Leslie."

Why? He had two reasons: "I dare say that it’s the first time anyone in the history of mankind has proposed marriage in quite this way"; and "hopefully she’ll give an even more enthusiastic "yes" to the second proposal than she did to the first one!"

Weiss-Malik called on the community to email her and encourage her to tell him yes a second time, which may constitute harassment in some states.

More studies will be needed to determine whether the subspecies geek, or more specifically, "the Google geek," is prone to excessive or repeated demonstrations of valor once the lifelong coital arrangement has already been secured, and whether this species, already prone to difficulty in mating, will show a proclivity toward adding more obstacles to an already precarious ritual just to look cool among his intraspecies peers.  
It may well be another suggested subspecies, "geek girl," has a higher tolerance for such excessive displays of gratitude and longing, which previously the female human has found off-putting and a little frightening.




Hat tip to Google Earth Blog