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Flavor Flav, St Patricks Day, and The Hunger Games

Today's Funniest Tweets

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Flavor Flav, St Patricks Day, and The Hunger Games
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Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

Enjoy!

Flavor Flav is 53 today, but he won’t be celebrating. He’s exhausted from spending all weekend springing forward all his giant neck clocks.(image) 6 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry® ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Jesus would definitely throw a car battery at Rick Santorum if He saw what he jerks off to.(image) 1 minute ago via Tweetbot for iOS ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Just read that Flavor Flav is opening an eatery called, “Flavor Flav’s House of Flavor.” My guess is that the flavor is syphillis.(image) 46 minutes ago via Favstar.FM ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Any shirt Chris Brown wears is a wife beater, if you think about it.(image) 1 minute ago via TweetCaster for iOS ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Northwestern v. Washington in NIT Sweet Sixteen tonight! It’s airing on ESPN 3 and an old TV in the back of a pawn shop!(image) 18 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Tomorrow for St. Patricks Day I will be wearing green and vomiting yellow.(image) 31 minutes ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Tomorrow is “Endless Flogging Molly Death March Day”, according to bar & pub sound systems.(image) 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

So glad they finally got that sicko Clooney for what he did to those poor, innocent children.(image) 1 hour ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I’ll vote for whichever candidate outlaws grocery store solicitation.(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I drugged my assistant because she was dressed for a job interview but it turned out to be for her child custody hearing.(image) 1 hour ago via Favstar.FM ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Pintrest makes me feel pretty.(image) 2 hours ago via Twitterrific for Mac ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

I thought The Hunger Games was when we try and make a snack out of a bunch of random shit in our pantries.(image) 2 hours ago via web ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Need more proof #TebowTime is over? The Broncos are making a last minute drive, and Timmy’s not behind the wheel. #PursuitOfManning(image) 2 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone ·  Reply ·  Retweet ·  Favorite · powered by @socialditto

Flavor Flav, St Patricks Day, and The Hunger Games
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  • jerry

    dammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that bitch is uuuuuugly eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!!!!

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