Hello! Are you upset with your service provider? Does it happen to be Comcast? Are you a Time Warner Cable subscriber who’s about to be a Comcast customer? Do you feel the ground eroding beneath you, as your options for broadband internet and cable television shrink before your very eyes? Do you want to punch Andy from customer service directly in the dick?

Those are all appropriate feelings of frustration, but it’s important to remember one simple fact: Comcast does not give a fuck about you.

Yes, this is obviously a Funny or Die parody–but can you identify anything untruthful in it? Nope? Me neither. Even that stuff about Hulu and Netflix? Truth.

So remember folks, Comcast could not care less about you. Have a good Friday.

Image via Funny or Die