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BlackBerry, Bacon, and Adobe Reader

Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression. And what better...
BlackBerry, Bacon, and Adobe Reader
Written by Josh Wolford
  • Twitter is a wonderful place for one-liners. To be funny on the site, you’ve got to be sharp and practice economy of language. You’ve only got 140 characters to make an impression.

    And what better way to wind-down the work day than with a selection of some of the day’s most entertaining tweets.

    Today, Twitter is pretty outraged at the BlackBerry outage, one user has a suggestion for Herman Cain, and we find out the real risks of jogging.

    Enjoy!

    If Herman Cain could pitch his 9-9-9 plan to the tune of the Subway $5 footlong song, I would be powerless to oppose it. 22 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    A woman gave birth shortly after finishing the Chicago Marathon on Sunday. And that’s why I don’t jog. 7 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Good thing I proof read my tweets because I almost said studying for a “meth test” instead of “I’m addicted to cocaine.” 6 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    I keep smelling bacon so either there’s bacon around or I’m having a delicious stroke. 5 hours ago via Echofon · powered by @socialditto

    “10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash, now we have no jobs, no hope and no cash.” “PLEASE, DON’T LET KEVIN BACON DIE!” 3 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    Calling all iPhone users… get that BlackBerry experience by turning your phone to airplane mode ;O) 35 minutes ago via Twitter for iPhone · powered by @socialditto

    “Happy Medium” is a description of both Mitt Romney’s appeal and my penis. 3 hours ago via TweetDeck · powered by @socialditto

    Adobe Reader created a desktop icon without my permission. #FirstWorldProblems 5 hours ago via TT Commander · powered by @socialditto

    “There won’t be humans in 500 years. Enough people choke themselves when they jerk off we gave it a name. We ain’t a species made to last.” 3 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    And 3.2 wins. RT @ProFootballTalk Vick on pace for 4,000 passing yards, 1,000 rushing yards 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Education: Your third grade teacher lied to you. You never use cursive. 1 hour ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    “Food is bad.” –every documentary on Netflix 19 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

    Dear Blackberry, I think it’s nice that you’re honouring Steve Jobs’ death with a 3 day silence 7 hours ago via web · powered by @socialditto

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